SAY YES TO LIFE 7. “The oldest, shortest words -
'yes' and 'no' - are those which require the most thought.” ~ Pythagoras
“When you come to a fork in the road, take it.” ~ Yogi Berra
What’s your default response? Don’t
think you have one? Check again. We all have one we favor and it usually doesn’t serve us – whether it is Yes or No. Most people fall into one of two camps – they say "no" immediately as a default because they see everything as a problem and so they avoid. The other camp of people say "yes" when they really don’t want to be- cause they fear disappointing someone. Either one is crippling you! I know that sounds harsh and I’m sorry but this one thing is causing serious havoc in your life! Here’s the solution – say YES more often but really mean it. Say it with an air of excitement and expectation of wonder- ment. But only say it more often when you mean it and say NO the other times. Say "yes" to situations that you’d nor- mally pass on. For example, when some- one asks you to go out with the office for happy hour say "yes", when you are given an opportunity to go speed dating say "yes" (even though you normally would never do that), say "yes" whenever opportunity pops up in your life. But say "no" to obliga- tions that you don’t really want to take on. If you’re asked to spend all day Saturday to help a friend move and you’d rather not,
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then say "no". Or say, “I can help for 2 hours from 10-12pm but then I have to leave” if that makes it easier. Setting good boundaries open up your life, they are not ways you fence yourself in. So really think about your answers – if you get that feeling in your stomach, you know the one, then say "no". But if it is something you’d just default to a "no" for no reason in particular then say "yes" next time.
1. What is your default answer? 2. Be more aware of how you respond to opportunities that pop up in your life. 3. What support can you get to help you see what your default thinking is costing you in terms of happiness?
LET GOTO LIGHTEN UP 8.
“Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go and then do it.” ~ Ann Landers
“You will find that it is necessary to let things go; simply for the reason that they are heavy. So let them go, let go of them. I tie no weights to my ankles.” ~ C. JoyBell C.
When you have been really upset, or mad, or hurt has anyone ever told you to just let it go? At that point did you just want
to hit them in the face? The madding thing is not knowing how to let it go. Otherwise wouldn’t you? Here’s an easy process for releasing those uncomfortable emotions: First of all realize you are not your
emotions. You are not mad, you feel mad. You are not hurt, you feel hurt. This may seem trite but by separating you from your emotion creates the space needed to make the shift. Second, bring that emotion alive right
now – really feel your feelings. Once you are there ask yourself, “Can I let this feel- ing go?” and feel what your answer is. If it is NO then accept that you have decided at this time to hold onto this negative feel- ing. (That’s important because it gives you the power of decision – it doesn’t have you, you are consciously deciding to hold onto it). If the answer is Yes, then feel yourself releasing it. Feel your jaw un- clench, feel the tension slip away, feel yourself becoming more relaxed. You’ve all had this experience – it feels like getting good news when you’ve been waiting for test results or some other report of some kind.
Know that releasing these emotions
isn’t giving another permission to treat you unkindly or saying what they did was OK. It is simple freeing yourself from the chains of negative, heavy emotions that are weighing down your life. 1. List the situations that have active, negative charges for you. 2. Go through the above steps to release those heavy emotions.
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