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Enjoy life – before you get caught by the prune stones


WELCOME Page


The Sign & Digital UK show is this month so this issue we have a special preview starting on page 91. As well as timetables for workshops and seminars, there’s a listing of exhibitors, news of what many will be showing on their stands, and some very nice sounding prizes to be won. Me, what I’m looking forward to most is meeting up with people I haven’t seen since


last year. Emails just aren’t the same. If you’re at Sign & Digital UK this year, come along to stand P114 and say hello. Feeling my age the other day, I thought about an old lady that used to live a few doors


away from us. Not just any old woman, but a kind friendly and very cheerful one. Like many old people she eventually moved into a care home. As I’m only a few years away from one myself, I was sympathetic and thought I’d pay her a visit to cheer her up. I made it an early visit owning to other commitments. Well, you have to have a get out story otherwise these visits can last for hours. I was let in at 9.30am to find the last few residents having a late breakfast. It was two


ladies negotiating cornflakes and prunes. I watched them eating from across the dining room. After eating a prune they put their spoon up to their mouth to spit out the prune stone and placed the discarded stone onto the plate in the middle of the table. On finishing their breakfast they wandered into the kitchen with their empty plates and then took up their positions in the sitting room. The last one down for breakfast was an old gentleman. For breakfast he had branflakes.


After a few mouthfuls he started to dispose of the prune stones, in fact a lot of prune stones. Like the two before him, on finishing, he took out his plate to the kitchen. On his return he spotted me and decided to sit with me for a chat. As I was the only bloke there, it popularly made a nice change from talking to what seemed almost exclusively female residents. The conversation soon died down to a trickle so I asked him about his breakfast. “It’s the same thing every day, branflakes, branflakes and more branflakes,” he said. “You had an awful lot of prunes with your breakfast,” I replied. “No I didn’t, I hate them.” he said. I never bothered to point out that he’d left around 20 prune stones on the side of his


plate. He told me he doesn’t like prunes and the care home do not give him prunes. I found out each plate of breakfast is placed out to where each person sits but the old gentleman’s plate is placed in the middle as he’s the last down and there are not enough chairs to go round the table. Unfortunately, his plate was used as a communal bowl to place the other residents’ unwanted prune stones. Believe you me, I am not looking forward to a care home......


First lady to the second lady: “I think it’s Monday today Dorothy”. About one and a half hours go by and lady number two replied, “Miriam, I think you will find it’s Tuesday.” Another forty-five minutes go by when the third lady gets up and says “If you two are going to argue all day, then I'm going back to my room.”


ISSUE 135 MARCH/APRIL 2012 Sign Update 5


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