F e a t u r e s
A View from Kabul H
by Wing Commander Gary Kelly
aving leſt Blighty on 30th December, via the VIP Lounge at Brize Norton and a first class seat courtesy of
the Royal Air Force, I arrived in Kabul refreshed and ready to party at a quarter to midnight on New Year’s Eve. Sadly there was no party to go to; instead I was pointed in the direction of a 16-man tent to settle into for 2010. Great start to the new decade.
Once I had found my feet, life at the ISAF (International Security Assistance Forces) Joint Command, Kabul, turned out to be remarkably simple. Most of our time revolves around work – I generally start at 8am and finish around 10- 11pm. The working day is punctuated by lunch, the gym, and dinner. That’s it really.
The HQ was (and continues to be) under construction following the move from down-town Kabul to within the boundary of the International Airport. The working accommodation was established in what was a Gymnasium, converted for the purposes of running the ISAF campaign throughout Afghanistan. Despite the appearance of a typical Joint Operations Centre the building retains its distinctly gymnasium-like scent.
Our living accommodation is luxurious in comparison to those who are forward deployed.
Life in the HQ is, as it always has been in war, pretty cushy compared to the harsh reality of the front line. God bless those are out fighting the Insurgents on a daily basis…
Domestically, we are billeted in 16-man tents for the initial period of the tour, awaiting a room in the buildings which are under construction. After a few weeks most people are moved into buildings in 8 or 3-man rooms. Things are improving – today the cardboard curtains in the rooms were replaced with blinds.
It is readily apparent that the staffs that make up the ISAF HQ come from very diverse national backgrounds. Along with military experience and fighting prowess, the forty- three contributing nations all bring with them a particular piece of their own cultural norms. Some good, some bad, some simply bizarre! These are most obviously on display in the ablutions. I am aware that this is a family publication and will refrain from details, but suffice to say I can confirm that the notion of ladies taking longer to groom themselves than men is a distinctly British phenomenon. The differing attitude to European grooming is apparent, and brings new meaning to the ISAF acronym:
A German: I Self Admire Frequently A Frenchman: I Simply Am Fabulous (although, like NATO/OTAN, they say it Fabulous Am Simply I)
A Spaniard: Isthethethethe Sethethethethe Andeluthia Fuertaventura! A Brit: I Simply Am Fed-up of having to queue for a shower…
The fabric of the HQ is evolving and the amenities are slowly arriving. There is a small gym with treadmills, free weights and cross- trainers; an ancient Afghan Barber who uses hand-clippers (ie hand-powered, not electrical) and knows only one hairstyle – VERY short; a few shops and two coffee bars. There is even a Thai restaurant – run by an Irishman!
Most of the shop buildings are actually ISO containers which have been stacked on top of each other, welded together, fitted with power and windows, and then painted. The result is surprisingly good, and once inside they feel just like any other room. The biggest morale booster is access to the internet. Mail can
www.raf-ff.org.uk Summer 2010 11
take three weeks to get to us, so email comes into its own. Although there is no WiFi across the unit, most people can access email fairly regularly. It is a communication lifeline.
The Royal Air Force contingent gathers once in a while to gossip about what we are missing about home – family, friends, Morris Dancers (who said that?). We even had a curry night recently with beer! Sadly, the labels on the bottles also included the words ‘non-alcoholic’. The Brits have a small 2-up, 2-down (4 ISO Containers) which provides a place to watch BFBS TV, collect and post mail, read Envoy (!), and pick up treats which are sent by the British Public to cheer up the troops. The generosity is humbling, and many of the parcels are accompanied by letters of support from all walks of society. It is a little piece of Britain in Kabul, and very welcome for that.
However, I remember Britain being a little more than ISO containers, no matter how well painted. Exploring green hills in the Yorkshire Dales, a pint in the pub with friends, the newspapers, and Sunday lunch with family – you can’t get that in Kabul. Having been here for 100 days I’m thinking: Roll-on R&R… and some Morris Dancing!
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