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LIVE LOVE LEGACY: KATE BENSON 8TOP TIPS FOR YOU AND


IN MY LAST ARTICLE I gave 4 tips each for both teens and parents to improve their relationship. These tips were:


 Relax  Remember who's who  Keep up, slow down  Stay connected and keep the freedom.


It's just a matter of making some adjustments to navigate through an exciting and formative change in your relationship. The most useful skill you can gain is to smile take yourselves lightly and enjoy the ride." In this article I'd like to add to those tips,with more insights and ideas for you to consider and try out. Who knows, you might start noticing a big difference in the way things work at home! b www.meta-nlp.co.uk


Parent Tip 5 Mind your language


Most of the problems parents have with their teens are to do with how they say things not what they say. Parents often talk to their teenagers using words that are guaranteed to upset them. Parents try to get their teens to do what they want with phrases such as: You have to…. You must… You need to… You can’t…. More often than not these phrases spark an argument or a ‘bedroom stomp’. Practise saying ‘George – tidy your room


before you go out please… thank you.’ ‘Mary put your dishes in the dishwasher please… thank you. Notice what a difference simple, straightforward and polite instructions can make to your communications.


YOUR TEENS, PART TWO


Kate Benson continues her article on getting the best from the parent-teen relationship.


Teen Tip 5 Mind your language


Certain phrases you are likely to use will have a very negative and upsetting effect on your parents. Save your colourful language, street terms and swearing for when you are with your friends. Behave with your parents like you do when you visit your friend’s houses and are wonderfully polite to their parents. Obviously this will be very diffi cult and you will not always manage it but do try. It will make a big difference to how they


are with you and you may fi nd that you are allowed much more responsibility because they think you are sensible – so more points scored!


Parent Tip 6 Make a date with your Teen


Forget the trips to the zoo or family gatherings, and think about things that you and your teen have in common that you could share in this new phase of life. Do you share the same taste in music? Well probably not but maybe you share


the same taste in comedy or fi lms. Find something that you can share together and include one of their friends and make a night out together. In this way you can begin to build the beginnings of an adult relationship with your teen.


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Teen Tip 6 Make a date with your parents


Every now and again have a night out with your parents. It’s great because they will pay and you will get an enjoyable night out. Look through the ‘what’s on’ pages of your local paper and fi nd something that you will all enjoy. Invite a friend and go on a Tuesday when there isn’t anything exciting happening. You never know you may have a great


time and if not you can always chat on Facebook if you get bored plus you get more points to trade later.


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