P26 Arkwright :SGBGolf_NEW_template 18/06/2009 14:47 Page 26
Arkwright
ARKWRIGHT
THE INDEPENDENT VOICE
I
felt it was time I booked myself wear, if you wear them for an half goods, he knew all of his bloody rights
an appointment at the surgery – hour run twice a week they’ll probably – don’t they always. It was past
not the doctor’s or the dentist’s as last a fair length of time but if you closing time so to get rid of him I said
my health is holding up pretty well – wear them to work every day in all the only thing I could do was send
the MP’s surgery, the one the COD weathers, beat the hell out of them, them back to the supplier, he slammed
describes as the place an MP gives possibly stick them in the washing them on to the counter and left the
advice. Dangerous place! Would you machine (unlikely in the case of the shop barefoot refusing to leave a
take advice from the Labour pair I have in mind as they were far contact number. What does that tell
Government or anyone associated with too dirty to have ever received any sort you? The next day I was advised by
it? Anyway it wasn’t advice I wanted, of clean) and then expect a the supplier to tell Mr Disgruntled to
it was a protest I wanted to make about get in touch with them direct which I
the meddling EU and its affect on part did when he turned up 10 days later. I
of our business. Our man from the actually then forgot the whole matter,
House of Commons arrived late for the convinced that the supplier would see
appointment, muttered an apology, and
then made it perfectly clear he wanted
. . .
through his false claim. A few weeks
Would
passed and then, when picking up the
the whole thing over with as quickly as post one morning, I found a sourly
possible. Wouldn’t you think when written note to me, scrawled on the
teetering on the brink of losing your
you take
supplier’s letter confirming a
lucrative job you’d try sucking up to replacement pair would be made
anyone if they were bothered enough
to ask to see you? Once we’d
advice from
available; it wasn’t quite anonymous,
as I obviously knew whom it was
discussed my original purpose to meet from, but Mr Disgruntled had removed
with him it became inevitable that the
current economic situation would be the Labour
his contact details. The gist of the
message was he was right, I was
touched on as its fallout impacts on wrong and he wouldn’t be shopping
practically every aspect of life. It was
then that I realised he was in the
Government
with me again. Well that was a relief.
In this case I wasn’t able to get the last
wrong place and should have been at word but who needs customers like
the doctor’s surgery. Rather than call
him a liar I think it would probably be
or anyone
that? Perhaps in a similar vein the MP
thought, “Who needs votes like that?”
less likely to cause me to be sued if I I am, however, mystified that the
said his mental state was somewhat
delusional. According to him this
associated
supplier caved to such a claim,
particularly without checking out my
country is not in a mess; well I view on the consumer’s personal
suppose you would say that if you’d
with it? . . .
profile, so now need to check out
just been elevated to a minor minister criteria for replacement (before
and your pay cheque had gone up too. naming the supplier).
His denial, denial, denial made any
further rational conversation While chatting at a rather posh drinks
impossible. That’s OK though, party recently, I was conscious of
because I’ve written a follow up letter replacement to my mind the customer someone watching me; a secret
to him and signed it “Yours, truly a is extracting more than the micky!! admirer? Suddenly they shrieked, “I
lost vote” and as I don’t expect a reply The returnee rolled up without a knew I knew you, just didn’t recognise
I’ll have the satisfaction of having the receipt wearing the abused pair. I was you with your clothes on!” Eek! was
last word. pretty certain it was well over six my past catching up with me?
months since purchase because I Thankfully no, it was only one of my
How long is a pair of trainers meant to remembered he haggled over the price fellow early morning swimmers who I
last? If you wear them for 5 minutes at that point! I wasn’t prepared to offer didn’t recognise immediately either as
every day to tiptoe round your any sort of replacement as this was they looked completely different
bedroom one could anticipates years of clearly a serial claimant of “faulty” without goggles and noseclip!
26 SGB SPORTS JUNE 2009
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