and happiness. “It’s important not to ‘catastrophize’ or generalize a failure and extend it to other areas of life,” says Dr. Steven M. Southwick, a professor of psychiatry at Yale University School of Medicine who focuses on post-traumatic stress disorder and resilience.


Make Caring Connections Social networks are critical in the face of challenges, resilience experts agree. “When we are wronged or feel unsafe, it’s natural to withdraw when we should do the opposite,” says Feldman. “It’s also not the number of friends you have, or even how much time you spend with them, that matters. All you need is at least one person you can count on.” “We are built to be connected


with others. It has a significant impact in regulating stress,” says Southwick, a co-author of Resilience: Te Science of Mastering Life’s Greatest Challenges. Over the past two decades, Southwick and his colleagues have studied three groups that have come through harrowing events: being Vietnam War prisoners, Special Forces instructors and civilians. Tey found people that rebounded strongly oſten shared common attributes, including embracing a spiritual outlook and social network. In 2013, Damon Redd, of Boulder,


awoke to a severe flooding event, with his home and business buried under five feet of mud and water that nearly wiped out his clothing business, Kind Design, overnight. “It was the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through, to lose everything I had built. It also gave me a new perspective on what’s important. It made me aware that you can replace physical things, but you can’t replace memories. My mind was blown away by the support I received.” Redd ended up paying forward the


kindness. “We cleaned and repaired 1,500 pairs of gloves in our inventory that were damaged that day, and are donating them to search-and-rescue teams and ski patrols. Te more good you do, the more good other people will do,” Redd professes. Altruism and owning a moral code is


another common characteristic of resilient individuals, according to Southwick. Having a purpose is a huge indicator of whether a person will rise to the occasion. “You


can endure almost anything if you have a mission, or believe what you are doing has meaning. It gives you great strength,” he says. In 2016, Bobbi Huffman lost her


high school sweetheart and husband to suicide a few days before Valentine’s Day. As she began to process the tragedy, she saw two choices ahead: “Drop into a deep depression and give up or focus on our deep love for one another, get into therapy, and make a difference by inspiring, encouraging and helping others,” says Huffman.


Parents do a disservice to their kids when they try


to remove adversity from their lives. When little things go wrong, rather than rush to fix it, let the kids figure out a solution. They’ll realize it’s not the end of the world.


~Doug Hensch She chose the latter, asking for


professional help and signing up for the 16-mile Overnight Walk for Suicide Prevention, in New York City. “Getting into the best shape of my life at age 50 became my passion. As I walked through the night, I reflected on our beautiful memories as a couple. It was an amazing, healing experience,” reflects Huffman. Forgiveness—whether for others or


ourself—is another key to help us move forward, reports Feldman. “Oſten, people can get stuck in blame, but resentment keeps people shackled to the past. If and when a person is ready to forgive, widespread research indicates that it can lead to better health outcomes.”


Strengthening Our


Resilience Muscle Experts point out that there isn’t any one perfect formula or single must-have trait for building resilience, and none we can’t develop. Learning a skill like mindfulness is an easy place to start.


RESOURCES Helpful Organizations OptionB.org provides a supportive space online for survivors of trauma and adversity to share stories, connect with others and get help from experts. LearningConnection.Stanford.edu/


RESILIENCE


Resilience-Project normalizes setbacks and failures as part and parcel of professional and personal growth, and provides Stanford University students and faculty a platform to swap stories and coping strategies. Resilience.Education.UTexas.edu


conveys an interactive e-learning platform developed by the University of Texas at Austin to foster a better understanding of resilience and develop related skills.


Films and Books Charged: Te Eduardo Garcia Story documents the journey of chef and outdoorsman Eduardo Garcia, whose life changed irrevocably when he was jolted with 2,400 volts of electricity while hiking in Montana. Garcia lost his hand, ribs and muscle mass, but survived the injury with the help of his former partner, and became an athlete and speaker for the Challenged Athletes Foundation. Unbroken depicts the life


of Olympian and war hero Louis Zamperini, who survived 47 days on a raſt aſter a near-fatal plane crash in World War II, only to be captured by the Japanese Navy and sent to a prisoner- of-war camp. Te film is based on the non-fiction book of the same name by Laura Hillenbrand, herself the survivor of a disabling chronic illness. Te 33 tells the true tale of 33


miners trapped inside a mine in San Jose, Chile, for more than two months, the longest such entrapment in history. All were rescued alive. Wild is based on Cheryl Strayed’s


memoir of her solo hike of 1,000-plus miles on the Pacific Crest Trail without any training, following the loss of her mother and marriage.


February 2018 19


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