Ten Ways … to face the future
By Robert Ashton
The other day I attended a debate about the variable quality of care people receive as they near the end of life and this really got me thinking. The speaker was a psychologist with a particular interest in palliative care. He made the point that whilst a birth is eagerly anticipated and planned for, death is something most choose to ignore until it happens.
His argument was that with forward planning and effective pain relief, death is not something to be feared. Instead our closing weeks and months present opportunities to forgive, reflect and finally make time for those unrealised ambitions. Palliative care, he explained, is all about making the most of the final year of life.
‘But what has this to do with me,’ I hear to ask. Well let me state one obvious fact. If you’re aged over 45, you are very probably already more than half way through your life. When you reach your sixties you will probably have already lost a few friends and colleagues. More importantly this is also the decade when most of us see our parents, uncles and aunts die. That perhaps more than anything makes us realise that we are mortal.
So rather than blindly pushing ahead assuming that you can continue living and working for ever, let’s face the reality of our situation and live our lives accordingly. Here are 10 ways to better face the future:
1. Make time for the elderly – It’s just too easy to be busy and not make time to visit elderly relatives. But when they’re gone, the opportunity to learn about their lives and experiences is lost forever. It’s also important to encourage your kids to visit their grandparents. They’ll have much in common to discuss, including you!
2. Fund your pension – Nobody wants a Dickensian dotage, but unless you make provision for your old age, that might happen. Of course it’s important to live life to the full now, and mortgages and university fees may soak up most of your free cash, but don’t neglect your pension. None of us can bank on inheriting from our parents.
3. De-clutter your home – I’ve lived in the same house for more than 20 years. Over that time my work and life have changed, but I’ve thrown little away. Imagine you and your partner were killed in a plane crash. Who would face the task of clearing your home and what would they think? Why not declutter your home right now, ditching stuff from your past and make room for new interests?
4. It’s never too late to learn – I’m learning to play the piano, and have a lesson each Friday. I usually have a brief chat with the previous student who leaves as I arrive. He’s 80 years old and already a competent pianist. Even so he wants to improve his playing and has a lesson each week. He’s not old!
5. A healthy body means a healthy mind – I am an enthusiastic user of my local gym. Each Wednesday morning I meet my friend Ann there. She’s 83 and has a personal training session to push her to nudge the boundaries of her physical ability. The endorphins a good gym session can deliver are good for your mental health too. Ageing can be depressing if you let it!
6. Write it down – Your life thus far will have been packed with experiences, many of them unique to you. Why not make time each week to write a blog and share them with the world? You’ll be surprised at how different past events appear, when you write about them today. It’s also always a good idea to write a handbook for your home. It means that others can find the stop-tap or know the best plumber to ring if you’re unable to tell them.
7. Attack your bucket list – My parents had many places they planned to visit in their retirement. But both died in their 50s, so never made it to any of them. It really is foolhardy to put off realising those bucket list ambitions. Create the fond memories now that will sustain you when you reach old age.
8. Mentor a rising star – Were you picked out as a high achiever early in your career? Even if not, time will have given you the experience to spot tomorrow’s leaders in your workplace, or social circle. Taking an interest in, and supporting a young rising star is a great way to put your experience to good use. It’s also, to be blunt, one way to make sure that at least one or two people won’t forget you when you grow old.
9. Plant a tree or two – We all know that planting trees is good for the planet, but planting trees is also a good way to be remembered. When I drive past the place where I grew up, I can now see fully mature trees that I can remember my father planting 50 years ago. Even better, if you have a few acres, is to plant woodland that will be enjoyed for generations to come.
10. Write a plan – They say that the best business plans are those that predict when the founder will step down, or the venture will be sold. With the goal firmly in sight, you can pace the evolution and development of people, products and engineer performance to build in the value you hope one day to realise. Why not do the same for the remainder of your life?
Let me end by introducing you to the concept of urgency. Think about your parents and grandparents generations. What is the greatest age any of your family has attained? How much older than you are now were they when they died? Now take off five years for ill health and infirmity and you have a good estimate of your useful remaining years. Be sure to live each one to the full!
PAGE 12 JANUARY/FEBRUARY 2020 FEED COMPOUNDER
Comment section is sponsored by Compound Feed Engineering Ltd
www.cfegroup.com
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