wisewords
Seeking Soulmates Online Coach Evan Marc Katz’s
Advice for Internet Dating by Kim Childs
N
atural Awakenings recently
launched its own online dating site, which got us won- dering… what does it take to find that ideal someone? We decided to call on dating coach Evan Marc Katz, author of I Can’t Believe I’m Buying This Book: A Common- sense Guide to Successful Internet Dating, for advice. Katz, who calls himself a personal trainer for love, coaches success- ful women in the art of successful dating. He says that while online dating simply makes sense in today’s world, it’s important to do it wisely.
Online dating is nearly the norm these days. What has
changed? It’s a perfect marriage of technology and opportunity. There are about 100 million singles in the United States, and everyone has a personal com- puter and a phone, which allows us to connect immediately with people we’d never meet in the course of our day-to-day life. Think about a woman in her 40s
that wants to date and lives in a suburb with kids, has a full-time job and whose friends are all married; it can be hard
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for someone like that to meet men. Online dating al- lows her to essen- tially create a love life from scratch. The problem
is that most people think they can just go online and suc- ceed, without real- izing that there’s an actual skill to it. You can’t just shop for a partner the way you can order up other things on the Internet.
Can you share some tips for singles just
starting out? I created an audio series called Find-
ing the One Online, in which I share best practices and some key mistakes to avoid. For example, people sign up for online dating for a month and expect to fall in love in 30 days. That’s like being 50 pounds overweight, signing up for a one-month gym membership and quitting after only losing three pounds because you didn’t meet your goal. The process of finding a good
match is more like training for a mara- thon—you can’t log on and manifest a partner right away by talking to ev- eryone on the site in a month’s time. That’s completely unrealistic, and yet it’s the number one reason people fail, because they expect too much too soon and don’t stick around long enough to learn how to use the system.
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