healthykids
TEEN DRAMA QUEENS
Keeping the Mother-Daughter Bond Strong
by Meredith Montgomery F
or many, the strong mother- daughter bond seems to suddenly unravel when adoles- cence appears. “Par- enting is exasperating and wears you out,” sighs Heather Thomas, of Houston, Texas, a mother of three, including 16-year-old Mary Meghan.
“Actively engaging with my mom has
enabled me to balance
my independence with a dependable bond, which helps me grow into my true self. Plus, it allows my mom to know the real me.”
Mothers can gain some comfort in the biological reasons for the onset of emotionally charged argu- ments and repeated curfew violations. It begins with changes in the brain caused by an increase in the hormones that stimulate girls’ ovaries, and by age 10 or 11, the hormones become elevated to levels comparable to those of postmenopausal women. Dr. Christiane Northrup, author of
~ Eliza Reynolds
who co-authored Mothering & Daugh- tering with her daugh- ter Eliza, gently re- minds mothers, “The mother-adolescent daughter relation- ship is asymmetrical. Mothers are responsi- ble for being the adult in the relationship as their daughters grow up. Understanding this can be a relief to both of you.” Part of the respon-
Mother-Daughter Wisdom, points out that in addition to experiencing mood swings and temperature changes similar to those of menopausal women, girls’ rising estrogen, unbalanced by pro- gesterone, may likewise produce brain irritability. “It’s no wonder girls are both cuddling with and screaming at you in the same day,” she points out. Nurse Practitioner Sil Reynolds,
44 Collier/Lee Counties
swfl.NaturalAwakeningsMag.com
sibility of being an adult is to provide a safe psychological and emotional environment for children without taking things personally. The frontal cortex responsible for making decisions is still developing in the adolescent brain. Weathering mood swings and reactive outbursts, mothers can learn to remain steady, understanding that teens are not capable of giving back equally because their minds have not yet fully matured. “That’s how teens learn to return to a calm place, by seeing our mom remain steady through our storms,” Eliza observes.
Powerful Role Models Northrup believes that a daughter’s peers play a large role in her success-
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