managing her son Paris’ behavior, Mary’s (last names withheld) stress level was “pretty high,” recalled Mark Bryant, the family’s permanency placement specialist. “By the time [families] reach our program it’s like ‘Get this kid out of here.’ What they’re really saying is, ‘I really don’t want him to go, but I need some help manag- ing his behavior.’ ” Mary, 57, and Paris, now 17, have been together since he was 3 weeks old. She adopted him and another son, Javier, 16, when they were 3. But by third grade it was clear that Paris had mental health issues. A psychiatrist diagnosed him with bipolar and schizoaffective disorders. As time passed, things grew worse. “Happy and
laughing one minute and screaming and yelling the next,” Mary said. When Paris wouldn’t take his medications, in part due
to side effects including weight gain, he would go “totally off the wall,” Mary said. Twice in early 2011 he was hospitalized to adjust his medications. Concerned about the demands on Mary, a psychiatrist recommended he be placed in a long-term treatment facility. “Even as a mental health therapist, it’s always harder to work with your own kids,” Mary said. “I know all parents say, ‘I don’t know if I can do this anymore.’ ” Eventually Mary called Jessyca Vandercoy, Right
Turn program director, and asked, “What can you do to help me?”
First Right Turn helped Mary locate a therapist to work with Paris on managing his behaviors and the triggers that set him off during the day. Bryant worked with Paris one- on-one and found him a mentor—a retired father of three who takes him fishing. Sometimes Javier comes along. “His mentor has been really good for him,” Mary said. “Paris seems a lot calmer when he comes home. He’s always laughing and smiling.”
More than a year has passed since Mary first called
Right Turn and things have stabilized. Paris has a good combination of medications, monthly visits with his psy- chiatrist and meetings with his therapist every two weeks, she said. He attends high school in Omaha and wants to go to culinary school next year.
“I call Mark [Bryant] every so often if I need some- thing and they call me every two or three months to see if we need anything,” Mary said. “[He] tells me he thinks we’re gonna be OK.” A major sign of success is that “[Paris] is still in the home,” Bryant said. “[Mary] got the services she needed for him to be successful.”
Going further With a combined 220 years of adoption experience,
“either [Lutheran Family Services of Nebraska and the Nebraska Children’s Home Society] could have done this alone, but [Right Turn] is better because we’re doing it together,” Henrichs said. “My way of doing math in this situation is one plus one equals three.” Given the state’s size, she added, it “made sense for us to do this together.” Vandercoy said 54 families contacted Right Turn in the first month, mostly about mental health issues. Initially it was a support and referral program. But “parents would say, ‘I can’t keep this child in my home.’ We knew right away we needed to be something more,” she said. So lead- ers developed more intensive, specialized services. Right Turn secured funding to train mental health prac- titioners to be adoption competent. “Adoption is an area of specialty,” Vandercoy explained, adding that families formed by adoption deal with unique, complex issues not experienced by biological families. Core issues can include loss, rejection, guilt/shame, grief, identity and inti- macy in relationships. (See “7 Core Issues in Adoption” at
www.adoptionsupport.org/res/indexcorea.php.) In addition, Right Turn developed “A Step Further,” a home support program that helps children with attach- ment issues. Being placed in different foster homes is traumatic, and children have great difficulty forming close, healthy relationships. A Step Further helps with trauma, loss and attachment issues by teaching parents how the brain develops and how healing can take place.
Making closeness less scary
“Our families are parenting kids that are abused and neglected,” Vandercoy said. “For kids with attachment issues, closeness is the scariest thing on earth. [The pro- gram] gives parents activities to move that process along, so kids can effectively be in relationship. [Research shows] how a parent can be the vehicle of healing for a child. … We are giving parents education, training, support and guidance to be that vehicle.” Vandercoy speaks from experience—she was adopted from foster care as a child. “For me to be able to make sure kids can stay in their homes and have their needs met and be part of a family [is the best],” she said. “I can’t think of anything worse than for kids to lose their forever fam- ily. ... With the right training, support and programs like Right Turn, adoption disruptions happen less. That’s what research says, and that’s what happened with Right Turn.” After all, Henrichs added, finalizing an adoption
“doesn’t mean there won’t be any more challenges or problems. ... Right Turn lets adoptive families know they aren’t alone. We will be there for [them] 24 hours a day, [delivering] service ourselves or [connecting families] with someone who can deliver service.”
November 2012 29
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