Ben Stein Dreemz
Clothes Maketh Man M
y favorite store of all time is brooks Brothers. It’s a men’s emporium of suits, trousers, shirts, shoes, neckties, and socks. They are classics that say that the wearer is a man
of means, not flashy, not poor, intelligent, and eager to impress, but not at all to speak about being up-to-the- minute or “hip.” Its main store was on Madison Avenue in New York.
Its wearers knew that they had achieved some degree of achievement, but had no need to “show off” to anyone, male or female. I had the great good fortune to start wearing their clothes
when I was in college at Columbia in Manhattan. I wore their clothes pretty much for all of my life. I still wear their clothes from their internet catalogue even now. My college fraternity, Alpha Delta
Phi, insisted in a cheerful way that we “brothers” dress from their store. I think of them often because
they were a sort of billboard that told everyone we met that we were determined to be well-informed and respectable. Not like the slobby men who
O
dress up in T-shirts and shabby jeans with unkempt hair, with the smell of marijuana on their breath. Think about it: Do we want to look like criminals or like
solid citizens?
The Market Place
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I’ve been immobile except for movement by wheelchair and electric stair liſts for many moons. When I do try to move, I suffer from excruciating pains.
It should not be a hard question. Oh, and by the way, Brooks Brothers sells to women
and makes them look important and attractive, too. Come on people, let’s get with it.
n a personal note . . . Thank you to all the readers who inquired about
my absence from this magazine. Unfortunately, I suffered an injury to my spine and have been incapacitated for about five months. I’ve been immobile except for movement by wheelchair
and electric stair lifts for many moons. When I do try to move, I suffer from excruciating pains. In this horrible state, I review my 80-year-old life and consider what I have learned. Number one is to have as many
friends as possible. It’s lonely as hell without friends. Make sure you’re stocked with them for when the need arises. Second, it’s crucial to have
savings. You can talk on the phone all day if you don’t have to work. Third, make sure you have
enough meds to take the edge off the pain when you awaken at 4 in the
morning wishing you were dead. Fourth, stay in the sun as much as you can. Outside is a very good place to be.
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