kins told his audience, “Champions love people and use money – not the other way around.” Zig Ziglar offered these words of wisdom, “You can get anything in life you want, if you help enough other people get what they want.” Doctor Norman Vincent Peale once told the story of a famous Hollywood actor who consulted him about his self- doubt and feelings of inferiority when he had to address an audience. Instead of responding with fear, this actor overcame the problem by loving the people in the audi- ence. He described it as sending out love vibrations. When he started doing that, his ability to perform improved. Laurie Hayden, a noted Australian psychologist, advised people on how to win in sports and business. Hayden con- cluded that controlled aggression is a major component in any kind of winning. To win, we must harness our psycho- logical energy and must become its master, not its slave. In a Harvard Business Review article, “What Killed Bob

Lyons,” Harry Levinson wrote, “A major psychological task for every human being is to fuse these drives so that the constructive drive (love) tempers, guides.” Levinson uses this analogy: “Think of an automobile engine. A mixture of gasoline and air serves as the energy source. If there is too much gasoline, the engine will flood. If there is too much air, then it will sputter and die. With the right blend or fusion of fuel, and particularly with considerably more air than gasoline, with the gasoline then channeled through a mechanical structure, the automobile engine can serve a useful purpose.”

Society has established firm boundaries to regulate how we express love and aggression. Too much love or ag- gression in business leads to serious trouble. We can’t kill our competitors, and we can’t conceive of marrying every prospect. The key to success lies in the appropriate use of our drives.

tion, but they tend to have above-average cancellation rates. They often experience problems with being team players and prefer to work alone, without a partner. Their lack of love and care makes it difficult for them to maintain close friendships. They view the world as a battleground where only the fittest survive, and they are often preoccupied with survival issues. To some people showing these tendencies, even high levels of financial success fail to produce feelings of self-satisfaction.

3. LOW AGGRESSION/LOW LOVE: THE UNDERACHIEVER Lack of aggressive energy and low capacity for love are the trademarks of complacent underachievers. Their low drive prevents them from setting goals; they despise cold calling; and they often wonder about the lack of “realistic” sales opportunities. They tend to give up in situations when a little persistence would have earned them an extra sale, and they shrug off lost sales with fa- talistic statements. Their low drive for caring leads them to blame management (as well as their own customers) for their poor sales records.

Salespeople with these characteristics tend to find

refuge in the ranks of large companies, where the lack of aggressiveness is mistaken for the ability to conform, and the lack of love is interpreted as freedom from emotionalism. The absence of healthy, outward-directed drives can often lead to personal problems, which can stall career growth.

4. HIGH AGGRESSION/HIGH LOVE: THE SUPERACHIEVER To win in sales, we need to balance our drives and fuse

them appropriately. Each situation requires a slightly dif- ferent mix of love and aggressiveness. Well-balanced salespeople pursue their goals aggressively, while they show genuine care about their customers and co-workers. They balance their ability to listen with the urge to move the sale forward to the close. They can be firm while defending their price, and they don’t hesitate to collect an overdue account while maintaining a friendly and respectful attitude. They tend to balance their self-development by improving their people knowledge while advancing their profes- sional skills. Their key concerns are flexibility, balance, integrity, and consistent success. Smooth with peo- ple, tough with tasks, they are the personal charmers and professional top guns. They recover quickly from setbacks, take good care of themselves, and show a high level of emotional coping skills. They are aware of their responsibility for maintaining balance and continually adjust their drives to the demands of each new situation. They are well aware that, if they pursue a sale too ag-

gressively, their customers will sense high-pressure tac- tics and withdraw from the negotiating table. They also know that, if they lower their aggressive drive, they will fail to ask for the order – and will end up disappointed. Knowing that perfection is impossible, they allow room for mistakes yet move on quickly, not dwelling on them. Although they are functioning well above the levels of many others, they readily admit that they still have a lot to learn.

Superachievers know we can all benefit from becom-

ing stronger fighters, better lovers, and, above all, more balanced men and women. 


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