In some cases, salespeople express the language of love without words; they may use a softer tone of voice when they describe key product benefits. They may employ ges- tures that communicate complete devotion and affection toward their product.

THE ENERGY OF LOVE Like aggression, love releases powerful energy. While ag-

gressive energy works best when applied to problems, the emotional energy of love works best when applied to people. As mankind learned to transform the primitive energy

of a stream into electricity, we can transform the power of aggression and love into a superior and highly useful force necessary to survive, grow, and prosper. Sigmund Freud pointed out that transforming these powers demands seri- ous effort. “Restriction of the individual’s aggressiveness is the first and perhaps severest sacrifice which society

requires of him.” The sacrifice, however, often leads to at- tractive payoffs and extraordinary achievement. Harry Levinson, a noted psychologist and lecturer at

Harvard Business School, once wrote, “Just as there are always processes of growth and destruction in all biologi- cal matter, there are similar processes in the personality. These drives constitute the basic, primitive energy sources for the personality.” In an issue of Organizational Dynamics, Rodney Fer-

ris wrote, “Through love, managers can release the vast amount of human energy in an organization and thus in- crease productivity and creativity.” To work at its optimum level, love must be properly channeled. Love directed toward oneself tends to increase our sense of vulnerability, while love directed toward others tends to strengthen us. Sales trainers offer sound advice on how to direct the power of love for optimum results. Sales trainer Tom Hop-


As with all sources of energy, harnessing and refin- ing the original power is only the beginning. The real challenge comes with its economic use. Looking at the different levels of energy released, as well as the type of mix, we recognize four distinct categories of personality: low aggression/high love, high aggression/low love, low aggression/low love, and high aggression/high love. Just as a thermometer reading varies according to the amount of energy received from the sun, these catego- ries explained below are only illustrations of personality characteristics that can be found when our inner drives produce a certain mix of psychic energy over a long period of time. It is good to remember that we are in control of the thermostat setting and can choose just how much love or aggressive energy we are willing to invest to achieve success.

1. LOW AGGRESSION/HIGH LOVE: THE BELOW-PRESSURE ACHIEVER Salespeople who continuously invest into their custom- er relationships their abundant capacity to love without deploying an equal measure of aggressive energy tend to act like the romantic lover: They dream of bliss but


are too timid to kiss the bride or get married. In this category we find the kind of salespeople who love to “waltz” with their prospects and have great conver- sations – but, ultimately, go nowhere. They love the product, are good listeners and show great empathy, hate price increases, and can be overly generous with discounts. These salespeople put a much higher value on friendships than on orders, and they would be better off working in the PR department. They love books on psychology and human relations and tend to be overly concerned with confirming their customers’ feelings. Their preoccupation with getting along well with others often translates into much longer sales calls and above- average telephone bills.

2. HIGH AGGRESSION/LOW LOVE: THE HIGH-PRESSURE ACHIEVER Salespeople who allow their aggressive energy to be released without the guiding forces of love lean toward high-pressure selling. Often impatient with people’s emotions, they have a hard time understanding their customers’ feelings. They often ignore their prospect’s subtle nonverbal expressions and, in many cases, be- lieve a sales presentation isn’t over until they get “their money” out of the client’s pocket. They love books on military history, war stories, or biographies of military leaders.

These salespeople, who are hard on themselves, can be very successful in one-call selling situations when repeat business is less important. They are often hired for pioneer sales jobs, since they easily shake off rejec-

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