future. Experts estimate that the mind thinks between 60,000 – 80,000 thoughts per day. Of those thoughts, 80% are nega- tive and 95% are repetitive thoughts that we thought the day before and the day before that. Why? Because those thoughts are coming from our software program- ming downloaded in our first 7 years.
It’s the negative programs that rule our thoughts and can sabotage us over and over. If the subconscious mind is in charge 98% of the time and that’s where the programs are originating, it makes sense that we repeat behaviors like over- eating for instance, because we down- loaded some of these familiar messages (software) from our families:
“Finish your
plate...there are starving children in the world.”
“What’s wrong with you... why aren’t you eating?”
“Eat your carrots, you don’t want to go blind.”
“You’re going to sit there until you finish everything on your plate, no matter how long it takes.”
“I’m bad if I don’t eat everything on my plate.”
Another belief driven by downloaded
software that I see in my practice is rejec- tion, which can have more tentacles than a full-grown centipede. Rejection can manifest in ways that touch every part of our lives. If your parent, teacher or coach makes a dismissive comment or gives you a negative look before age seven, you will download the software that says “I reject
you.” It hurts but we rarely deal with those feelings. We’re wired to stuff our feelings down into our bodies. Failing a test, not be- ing chosen for a sports team, your BFF gets mad at you and won’t have anything to do with you, punishment without explanation are all actions that will trigger the rejec- tion software in your subconscious and the program will run instantly, over and over. It permeates the fabric of your daily life and can manifest as a secondary belief of, “I’m not good enough”.
The job of the subconscious is to store
and retrieve data. Your subconscious mind is subjective; it does not think or reason independently, it merely obeys the com- mands it received from your conscious mind. We call this proof. Your subcon- scious will always deliver the proof that what you’re feeling is true because you downloaded it as a child. It is not time- bound and cannot differentiate between childhood and an older age. The software runs automatically; it doesn’t know that the download is hurting your ability to move forward, nor does it care. It’s doing its job; automatically running the software program to keep you safe. Safety is the number one job of the subconscious mind.
If you’ve downloaded “rejection” and
“I’m not good enough” software as a child, every time a situation comes along that has the potential for growth and advance- ment, like trying out for the high dive team or moving up the corporate ladder, your subconscious will automatically run the downloaded software and flood your mind and body with negative thoughts to hold you back. As Henry Ford said, “If you
think you can or if you think you can’t, you’re right.”
Unraveling the Tentacles of Rejection As an EFT (Emotional Freedom Tech-
niques) Tapping Practitioner and PSYCH- K® Facilitator, I work with many clients to unravel the tentacles of rejection. I share this story, with permission, as an example of how far reaching rejection can span.
Madeline arrived at our EFT appoint- ment with mixed feelings about a disap- pointment she had experienced. I asked her to describe how she was feeling and she said, “hugely disappointed, angry and disrespected.”
“What was the event that caused these deep feelings?” I asked.
“Well... she explained, I was enthusias-
tically encouraged to respond to a Request for Proposal by a colleague that I trusted and believed was sincere. After weeks of work and spending a substantial amount of money on producing the necessary ele- ments, I submitted my response. I was con- fident that my colleague, who was on the judging committee, and who had strongly insisted that I submit, would make sure that I was one of the 10 chosen women.”
Madeline’s negative energy was palpable. She continued, “Not only did I NOT
get picked, they didn’t even have the courtesy to let me know. I checked their website and saw the roster of the 10 cho- sen speakers and was devastated not to see my name! I felt like my colleague had been completely disingenuous and had taken advantage of the situation to woo me into
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