MM Dad's eye view
‘It’s a very strange time in many ways, your natural reaction is to call in
international rescue, but instead you’ll probably just put the kettle on’
> Me: ‘I won’t. I’m telling you. I don’t know.’ Instructor: ‘You’ll know, the car will tell you. You’ll just know.’ CRASH. What’s even more annoying was that my driving instructor was
right of course – drunk, but right – and so it is with the onset of labour. You, or rather your partner, will just know when labour has started because she will have some or all of the symptoms listed below. • Your partner could experience lower back or abdominal pain that persists and is often accompanied by a crampy premenstrual-type feeling.
• Some women get diarrhoea-like symptoms in early labour as the body has a good old clear-out ready to give birth.
• A brownish or blood-tinged mucus discharge called the bloody show comes away. (Please avoid using the line about making a bloody show of yourself, no matter how tempting – now really isn’t the time!)
• Painful contractions that occur at regular but shortening intervals and become longer and stronger – bit of a giveaway that one.
It’s official Once your partner’s body is telling her unequivocally that she is in labour, when the pains she’s feeling are becoming longer, stronger and more frequent, you are on your way. It’s a very strange time in many ways, this event that you have been waiting for every day for nine months has finally started to happen and your natural reaction is to call in international rescue, but instead you’ll probably just put the kettle on. It’s a very good idea at this stage to try to time the
contractions, from when they first come on to when they begin to ease off, and then also the space between them. That’s two stopwatches worth. This will at least give you a rough guide as to how labour is progressing and, as a rule of thumb, you don’t need
6 Modernmum
to go to hospital until your partner’s contractions last at least 45 seconds and come five to ten minutes apart. While you’re both at home, try to encourage your partner to
stay as relaxed and rested as she possibly can, given that every few minutes she is laid low with an ever-increasing pain. She could watch a favourite film, take a warm (but not hot) bath, or just try her best to put her feet up in between the contractions. When she’s having a contraction, help her to get in whatever
position gives her the most relief. Now’s also the time to start using any breathing or relaxation techniques you’ve learnt at your antenatal classes. As the contractions really start to kick in, you’ll decide that it’s
time to hit the road. Every woman copes with labour pain differently and when it’s her time to go in, it’s her time to go in. When you arrive at the hospital, it would be lovely to say that
you will be greeted at the door by the midwife who has coached, cared and caressed your partner for the past nine months, but, especially if you live in a city, the chances are that you won’t. Now’s potentially a good time to get the birth plan out if you
like – double checking with your partner, of course, that she doesn’t want you to put a big red pen through the painkiller-free bit first!
You can read more about Mark's pregnancy and parenting experiences in his hilarious new book 'Pregnancy for Men: The Whole 9 Months'.
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