LIFE & TRENDS LINDA SEATTLE, WA.


MCMAHON “Well, I could worry, but I


worry, but I couldn’t do


anything about it,” she says of her separation from husband Drew. She was sent to work in Seattle;


he stayed in Wellington, Fla. Till Monday Do Us Part


Couples separated by long-distance jobs face big challenges to keep their marriages intact. ::


BY EMILY J. MINOR A


t first, it seemed like it might be fun. Drew McMahon, a


62-year-old South Florida


government attorney, was looking forward to a taste of independence when Linda, his wife of 30 years, had to move to Seattle for her job. “It defi nitely started off with a feeling of freedom,” he says. He regularly ate delivery pizza for


dinner and indulged in the fast food that his wife had banned from their table. “Linda is very aggressive about us eating well,” he says.


After work, he’d watch baseball


with the guys and drink beer with no worries about being interrupted or having to get home. And, not to tell any tales out of school here, but there were times when he wouldn’t keep up with the laundry or housecleaning.


SEPARATION ANXIETY Very quickly, however, reality set


in. “It was nice for maybe a week or 10 days to not have to worry about making the bed,” he says. “But I just became slothful. I drank more. I ate worse.” Meanwhile, in Seattle, where she was working for Nokia Siemens


COMMUTER MARRIAGE FACTS A full 49 percent of commuter couples


say it was the wife who first broached the idea of living apart; 24 percent said the husband suggested it; and 19 percent said it was brought up by both.


More than half of commuter couples


have been married nine years or longer. Surprisingly, divorce rates for commuter


marriages are slightly lower than for conventional households.


70 NEWSMAX MAXLIFE | MAY 2013


Network, Linda was also feeling liberated, but she was often miserable being away from Drew. Things got worse when what was to be a three-month temporary assignment eventually dragged out to three years on the Pacifi c Coast. In the extended-stay hotel room


where she was living, she didn’t have to worry about taking care of Drew or other household responsibilities. “Well, I could worry, but I couldn’t do anything about it,” she says. Linda tried to cope by staying


active. She went hiking and did a lot of bird watching. She kept up with her yoga, and explored Seattle’s urban culture. “I think it was harder on Drew


because he had to keep up the house and come home and walk the dog,” says Linda, who admits it was “never a deliberate decision for me to spend three years in Seattle.”


MAKING IT WORK She’s back in their Wellington,


Fla., home now, and has been since the summer of 2011. While refl ecting on the years of separation, she realizes that while it was not easy on either of them, Linda is gratifi ed that their marriage weathered the storm. Across America, more and more


couples are struggling with these kinds of far-fl ung marriages. The bad economy has caused married workers to take out-of-town assignments that they previously might have turned


In 29 percent of commuter marriages, it’s the wife who lives out of town.


Commuter couples are generally


well-educated, with more than 90 percent of the spouses having at least some college.


The biggest reason couples


give for living apart is that one spouse can’t find a job that pays enough locally.


ISTOCKPHOTO / MCMAHONS/COURTESY OF MCMAHONS


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