can’t bear that this happened. I can’t stand it! That’s “I-can’t-stand-it-itis.” 3) I’m no good for not doing as well as I must. I am an unworthy person. That’s “undeservingness.” And: They’re no good for not helping me to do as I must – that’s self-downing and downing others. 4) Because I failed this time, I’ll always fail. Or: They will always treat me unfairly and make me fail! Finally, 5) Because I can’t give up my must-do, where I started, I can’t change.
SP: What is the alternative? Dr. Ellis: To be more scientific and stay with your preferences, desires, wishes. Then, if something doesn’t work out the way you wish or prefer, there’s nothing wrong with you. A sale doesn’t have to work out for you to be all right.
SP: Does being scientific imply being able to step back and look at a situa- tion from outside it? Dr. Ellis: Yes, but don’t forget we don’t want the salesperson to be unin- volved. We want him or her to go back strongly to, “I want this sale very much. Now, how am I going to get it?”
SP: How do they? Dr. Ellis: By looking at their own and others’ mistakes and errors. And then trying to change. Also, by looking for better sales methods and working at using them.
SP: What method do you recom- mend using for looking at your own errors? Dr. Ellis: First, say to yourself, “I don’t have to do well. I don’t have to tell myself that I must do well.” Then you free yourself from being preoc- cupied with feeling inadequate and from other forms of ego damage. Then, it is not too risky to look at your own errors. Defensiveness is caused by self-condemnation. If you’re always condemning yourself because you must be a certain way or have to perform well, then you won’t look at your own mistakes clearly and you won’t really try to get any better.
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SP: What are some specific ways of changing the way a salesperson views his or her mistakes? Dr. Ellis: In selling, there are fairly common errors – like talking too much or too little, not showing inter- est in the other person, being overly intent on making the sale. You can make a checklist of what went on during a sales call, and then, when you’re not upset about any failure, ask yourself, “Now, which one of these things might I have done wrong?” Sometimes you can get feedback from the prospect or from other people. Then check your errors. The next step is to work at changing it.
SP: A salesperson could also ask his manager to evaluate what he might be doing wrong on a call. Dr. Ellis: Of course that would be the best person to ask. Also, he could record some of his sales pre- sentations and analyze them later with the manager.
SP: How do you define motivation? Dr. Ellis: Motivation is the desire to do something. It includes the willingness to work at it, but also the work itself. Motivation has to include will power as well as will. Will power has action as part of it. Will alone can just be in your head and you’ll never accomplish anything until you act on your will.
SP: So will could even be fantasy. Dr. Ellis: It very often is.
SP: What three things can salespeo- ple do to motivate themselves? Dr. Ellis: Well, one is thinking. Get rid of negative thinking, such as, “I must do well to be a worthwhile person.” Second is to prove to yourself the advantages of pushing yourself. Write down the present and future gains of active selling. Make a list of them and remind yourself of them. Third, overcome inertia by forcefully pushing yourself. Don’t sit around and stew. Go out and do. The prin- ciple of inertia works, in the negative, to prevent you from moving; but, in the positive, it also works the other
way. Once you get rolling, it’s difficult to stop.
SP: I look upon you as a motivator of other people. What advice do you have for managers who have to moti- vate others? Dr. Ellis: Well, a manager had bet- ter know the right words that will motivate his or her salespeople. But, in addition to that, he’d better show salespeople that they are perfectly capable of getting out there and selling. They may not grow rich quickly, but the manager’s tone and attitude show them that, by starting – no matter what their initial discom- fort – they will later enjoy their work and succeed at it. Show them the advantage of moving forward and the disadvantages of just sitting on their rumps and of falling back.
SP: So it’s not just what the manager says but how he or she says it that can be motivating? Dr. Ellis: That’s right. The manager’s encouraging coaching tone, “I know you can do it” – and the manager’s realistically acknowledging how hard it may be to sell, but still being en- couraging – can show his salespeople that, once you get going, and keep moving, it gets easier later on.
SP: Do you think that goals are very important for people? Dr. Ellis: They’re very important because, unless you have a goal, you can’t tell whether an act is good or bad. There’s no act that is good or bad in itself – it depends on the outcome you had in mind when you performed it. Goals are important to decide what’s right and wrong, what’s good and bad.
SP: What else do goals accomplish? Dr. Ellis: Strong, realistic goals are motivating. Sometimes, you can even motivate yourself with an un- realistic utopian goal, but then you can easily fall on your face later. But realistic goals will help you get what you want in life. The important thing is not to get hung up on impractical goals. They detract from your time and energy.
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