Turf Side Up Quote me happy
“I don’t think there’ll be any eggs from him in the morning.” Sky Sports Martin Tyler gets his sexes mixed up after a chicken ‘invaded’ the pitch during the Blackburn v Wigan relegation battle.
“I’ve a bit of advice for people who feel sympathy for me - don’t.” Professional golfer and multi- millionaire Lee Westwood reckons he’s got it pretty good, all things considered.
“You’ve got world class players who are sitting in England wanting to play the IPL when you’ve got some second rate Australians getting gigs.” Kevin Pietersen cannot understand why the likes of James Anderson and Graeme Swann went unsold in the IPL.
“I laugh when I hear stories, ‘Wolves have got relegated, people are going to come in and take all their players’- if they were so good they wouldn’t have got relegated.” Tottenham manager Harry Redknapp - blunt, but he’s got a point.
“I thought he acted like the south-end half of a northbound mule.” Paul Azinger wasn’t impressed with Tiger Woods’ occasional strops round Augusta.
“I didn’t play, and I’m glad, because there are some real bandits at our club. There’s no chance you can win.” Sir Alex kept his clubs in the bag during Manchester United’s team-bonding exercise at St Andrews.
“I blame the ECB for my Euro 2012 omission. Since they banned three-touch football my shop window has closed.” Graeme Swann explains his omission from Roy Hodgson’s England squad.
“It’s a rare man who can be that tough on the field and also have his own line of underwear.” Barack Obama takes his opportunity to poke fun at David Beckham.
“Go for the hat-trick of daft questions, go on.” Lee Westwood again, this time ridiculing a journalist after being asked if he would prefer to beat Luke Donald or Rory McIlroy in a play-off at Wentworth.
“Put some water on the f***ing greens. I can’t control the wind, but I can’t control the green staff either.” Ernie Els criticises the course setup at Wentworth, as conditions make life difficult for the players.
“Even if they tell me to come and cut the grass. I will do it.” Didier Drogba says he would love to return to Chelsea after he hangs up his boots.
“They’ll be up by September.” David ‘Bumble’ Lloyd is convinced that Steve Birt was planting potatoes, not repairing a foothole at Trent Bridge.
Cobbled together from Sky Sports, ESPN Sport and watching far too much sport on television!
DATES for your DIARY July
1st - Cricket, Second ODI, England v Australia, The Oval (
www.ecb.co.uk)
4th - Cricket, Third ODI, England v Australia, Edgbaston (
www.ecb.co.uk)
5th-8th - Golf, US Women’s Open, Kohler, Wisconsin (
www.uswomensopen.com)
7th - Cricket, Third ODI, England v Australia, Chester-le-Street (
www.ecb.co.uk)
10th - Cricket, Third ODI, England v Australia, Old Trafford (
www.ecb.co.uk)
12th-15th - Golf, Barclays Scottish Open, Castle Stuart, Inverness (
www.europeantour.com)
14th-15th - Rugby League, Challenge Cup semi-finals (
www.therfl.co.uk)
19th-22nd - Golf, The Open Championship, Royal Lytham & St Annes (
www.theopen.com)
19th-23rd - Cricket, 1st Investec Test, England v South Africa, The Kia Oval (
www.ecb.co.uk)
27th - 12th August - Athletics, London 2012 Olympic Games (
www.olympic.org)
August
2nd-5th - Golf, World Golf Championships, Akron, Ohio (
www.pga.com)
4th - Football, start of Scottish Premier League (
www.scotprem.co.uk)
19th-23rd - Cricket, 2nd Investec Test, England v South Africa, Headingley (
www.ecb.co.uk)
9th-12th - Golf, US PGA Championship, South Carolina (
www.pga.com)
12th - Cricket, ODI, Scotland v England, Edinburgh (
www.ecb.co.uk)
I herd it through the grapevine ...
... that everything’s rosie, but watch out for those goal moths! It all looks quite rosie
I’ve got my grapevine out, and I’ve got tom tom drums in every nation
… to help get into sink with US time ... where the hole storey began
... there was a big statue of Marion Munroe
Wolverhampton Wanderers, Blackburn and Bolton have been regulated to the Championship
… with the aim to keep them down to a certain freshold
Having to cater for duel sports is also very demanding
… you notice the goal moths
The club are hosting an Olympic Touch Event
I had a bling moment
You can follow Loz on Twitter -
http://twitter.com/pitchcareloz
16th-20th - Cricket, 3rd Investec Test, England v South Africa, Lord’s (
www.ecb.co.uk)
18th - Football, start of the Barclays Premier League and Football League season (
www.football-
league.co.uk)
24th - Cricket, First of series of five ODIs, England v South Africa, Swalec, Cardiff (
www.ecb.co.uk)
25th - Rugby League, Challenge Cup final, Wembley (
www.therfl.co.uk)
25th - Cricket, Friends Life T20 Finals Day, Swalec, Cardiff (
www.ecb.co.uk)
29th-9th Sept - London 2012 Paralympic Games (
www.olympic.org)
September
7th - Football, World Cup qualifying matches - Belgium v Wales; Moldova v England (
www.thefa.com)
8th - Cricket First Twenty20 international, England v South Africa, Chester-le-Street: (
www.ecb.co.uk)
11th - Football, World Cup qualifying match - Serbia v Wales (
www.faw.org.uk)
15th - Cricket, Clydesdale Bank CB40 final, Lord’s (
www.ecb.co.uk)
18th-7th October, Cricket, ICC World Twenty20, Sri Lanka (www.icc-
cricket.yahoo.net)
27th-30th - Golf, The Ryder Cup, Medinah Country Club, Illinois (
www.rydercup.com)
To add your event to Forward Thinking please email details to
ellie@pitchcare.com and don’t forget that you can add it to Pitchcare’s online calendar yourself! Simply log on to
www.pitchcare.com, select ‘Calendar’ in the Home drop down button on the top banner and click on “Add event’ at the top of the page.
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