not theirs. It is possible to find peace in the midst of conflict, understanding that the one leaving overwhelmingly wishes for a peaceful passing, including peace within the family.” The Death Over Dinner initiative,


founded by Michael Hebb in 2013, has been hosted by groups in more than 20 countries to help people engage in conversations on “how we want to die”—the most vital and costly discussion Americans aren’t having (DeathOverDinner.org/stories).


Practical Plans Te American Institute of Certified Public Accountants and its 360 Degrees of Financial Literacy program offer a free


downloadable national Guide to Financial Decisions: Implementing an End-of-Life Plan at Tinyurl.com/EssentialPlanNeeds. It includes basic descriptions of issues that arise as we age beyond retirement and details the critical documents needed for the individual, dependents, property, assets, estate planning, wills and trusts. It also addresses issues related to advance, treatment and do-not- resuscitate directives, insurance, types of funerals and costs, and Social Security, Medicare and veterans’ benefits. Guidelines suggest consulting with a certified public accountant or personal financial planning specialist. Te latest innovation is the blessing of a living funeral, a celebration of life while


Writing Our Legacy by Linda Sechrist I


n their books Caring for the Dying and Having the Last Say,


authors Henry Fersko-Weiss and Alan Gelb, respectively, advocate reviewing our life and writing a short narrative to explore its value as we approach our final act of Earth’s play. Processing experiences


from the past and what they mean at this juncture presents us an opportunity to achieve greater clarity and integrate them in a positive way in our life story. According to Fersko-Weiss, it has the power to reduce depression, increase life satisfaction, promote acceptance of self and enhance integrity of spirit, no matter what phase of life we are in. Te harvesting of life experiences should reflect our true humanity—flaws


and all—and what we’ve learned through mistakes and failures, as well as triumphs. Conveying a compelling mythic family story, values we’ve lived by and our embrace of meaningful relationships will help the people we know understand that, for all its difficulties and complexities, life is worth living. Our narrative, whether recorded as an essay or scripted video, becomes an act of praise for the giſt of the life we’ve led, imperfect as it may have been. It can also serve as a potential keepsake that passes along life lessons and values from one generation to another. Gelb suggests that summing up what’s most important to us in 500 to 1,000


words can be an experience to savor and enjoy at a reflective time in life, an opportunity to capture our legacy and even serve as our own eulogy. When we want a loved one no longer here to feel near to us and hear them one last time, it’s a way for them to literally have the last say, he adds.


28 Central Florida


As many as 80 percent of us say we want to die at home.


~CNN


the honoree is present to hear the eulogies, praises and farewells before they depart. AgingWithDignity.org provides a


downloadable Five Wishes document, a popular advance directive, or living will that covers personal, spiritual, medical and legal aspects. It’s easy to use and can serve as a family guide to prompt conversations about personal care preferences in the event of serious illness. New York Times journalist Mark


Leibovich wrote about how Massachusetts Senator Edward Kennedy chose to spend his final weeks in pursuit of a “good ending.” As death approached, Kennedy told friends that he wanted to take stock of his life and enjoy the giſt of his remaining days with the people he loved most. As a result, he continued enjoying his morning ritual of reading newspapers while drinking coffee, playing with his dogs, watching James Bond movies with his wife and holding family dinners and sing-alongs near nightly. He reveled in his bedside view of Nantucket Sound, sailed when he could and ate lots of his favorite ice cream. His mantra was, “Every day is a giſt.” “As our time winds down, we all


seek comfort in simple pleasures— companionship, everyday routines, the taste of good food, the warmth of sunlight on our faces,” remarks Boston’s Dr. Atul Gawande in Being Mortal. “If we strive in our final months for independence, companionship, mindful attention, dignity, wisdom, joy, love and freedom from pain, we have the power to make those days less miserable, confusing and frightening.” In these many ways, we can manage


to gently embrace and tenderly navigate life’s final transition with grace and love.


Linda Sechrist is a senior staff writer for Natural Awakenings. Connect at ItsAllAboutWe.com.


Have a nice day Photo/Shutterstock.com


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