WELLBEING Becoming a master at overcoming hard moments
In his regular column for Education Today, MARK SOLOMONS, creator of triple ERA Award-winning Welbee, an online evaluation and staff wellbeing improvement tool, shares his advice on supporting personal wellbeing.
acknowledging the situation, not dwelling on disappointments, learning from mistakes and challenges, and moving forward. Perfectionism is one trait of educators that can undermine resilience. It is characterised by black-and-white thinking - the tendency to see all or nothing and it can make it easier to become dismayed and discouraged. If a lesson, meeting or other plan does not go as expected, there is little point in dwelling on the negative, in the same way as Roger Federer ignored the last point. Instead focus on what would have made it better and bring this to the next point you play.
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ennis superstar, Roger Federer, has been getting a lot of media attention since he’s taken a step back from the professional game. I came across his Commencement Address at Dartmouth College in the US – a few tips on tennis technique – and lots more about personal drive and attitude. He explained his annoyance when commentators described the ease with which he won, ‘Effortless is a myth. The truth is, I had to work very hard to make it look easy.’
Federer revealed that whilst he won 80% of the 1,526 singles matches he played, he only scored 54% of the points. He went on to say, ‘When you’re playing a point, it is the most important thing in the world. But when it’s behind you, it’s behind you. This mindset is really crucial, because it frees you to fully commit to the next point and the next one after that, with intensity, clarity and focus’.
The truth is, whatever game you play in life, sometimes you’re going to lose. A point, a match, a season, a job - it’s a roller coaster, with many ups and downs. And it’s natural to doubt yourself.
…’But negative energy is wasted energy. You want to become a master at overcoming hard moments.’
There are lessons for all of us and in particular the importance of being resilient and being able to overcome the hard moments that Federer talked about. There’s no silver bullet to overcome the challenges we face in education, whoever resides at No.10 when this article is published.
Resilience is having the capacity to withstand or quickly recover from difficulties. It means
Adopt a growth mindset, focus on improving and embracing failures as a chance to learn something new, meaning there can be development. Next time you will be more prepared and do a better job. This isn’t new to educators, and it is perhaps a good time to revisit in the current environment. Professor Carol Dweck, Stanford University, identifies 5 attributes of teachers with a growth mindset: they take responsibility for improving their practice; see setbacks and feedback as an opportunity to learn and grow their skills; actively seek learning opportunities and new challenges; have positive and high expectations of their students and use growth mindset language professionally and personally. Being compassionate is important. Teachers and leaders naturally display compassion to their students and colleagues, yet can find it difficult to practise self-compassion. According to Kristen Neff, Science of People, self-compassion is made up of three components: self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness.
• Self-kindness means being gentle to ourselves. Changing negative thoughts – worries, judgemental comments and complaints into positive ones, by: practicing positive self-talk; caring for our bodies and minds with healthy food, exercise and enjoyable activities; resisting being people pleasers; and giving hugs to those you love.
• Common humanity is recognising that all people suffer, struggle, fail, and feel separated or alone sometimes.
• Mindfulness is being in the present moment. When you’re struggling, focusing on the here and now can provide positive energy, and help you escape from negative thoughts.
Resilience can also be challenged by organisational culture, and the actions of those around us, especially during times of change. So, what steps might you take?
• Prioritise self-care – this includes physical exercise, hobbies, reading, or simply taking time to relax. Ensure time for yourself to reduce stress and improve work-life balance;
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• Develop your support network - relationships with colleagues, friends, and family provide emotional support, different perspectives, and practical advice during challenging times.
• Set realistic goals and boundaries - establish clear boundaries between work and personal life, to prevent overworking and allow time to recharge.
• Engage with professional development - stay updated with the latest research and strategies. Continuous learning enhances confidence and competence, equipping you to handle challenges.
• Stay positive and practice gratitude - keeping a gratitude journal or reflecting on things you’re thankful for improves your overall outlook and resilience.
• Maintain a healthy lifestyle – eat, sleep, and stay hydrated. Not always easy, and we know many in education struggle with good sleep – yet addressing all of these, makes it easier to handle stress and bounce back from setbacks.
• Foster a positive work environment - support colleagues and contribute to a positive and collaborative work environment – this significantly impacts resilience and overall job satisfaction.
• Embrace flexibility and adaptability - in the ever-changing landscape of education, being flexible and adaptable is crucial. Embrace change as an opportunity for growth, remain open to new approaches and ideas.
• Seek professional help when needed – if you’re struggling with stress, anxiety, or other mental health issues, seek professional help. Your employer may have a support scheme in place, or look to the support line from Education Support.
Building resilience needs regular attention, focus and hard work. Being aware of this and finding time to develop it, means you will be more prepared and ready to face any challenges or stressful situations that come your way. And remember – ‘effortlessness is a myth’.
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