Black; -; LEGAL PAGE 11
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Dear Hipster:
I’m super burnt out on the whole “holiday shopping” scene. I went to the movies
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Dear Hipster: Since he embraced kitsch and practically hid his most clever comments by saying them in the same soft tone of voice as everything else he said, was Bob Ross the ultimate anti-hipster?
— JASON M.
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If a happy little tree falls in the forest, but nobody’s there to hear it, does it softly whisper, “Hey, it’s okay, we’re all having a good time learning together here, and there are no mistakes, just happy accidents”? You may be onto something, although
first you must get past the “Bob Ross basically invented YouTube before it was cool” claims from hipster tech-media outlet, Motherboard. Admittedly, that’s pretty damn hipster. But here’s the thing, and it’s something the Motherboard article touches on when it describes how even over- caffeinated Counter- Strike players take a break from dissing each other’s mothers to watch Joy of Painting reruns: people love Bob Ross. He enjoys near-universal positive regard, and there’s just no way to square that with the universal disdain for hipsters that almost everyone — even fellow hipsters — will proudly assert if given half a chance. Ross’s earnest kindness and unflappable
positivity give him this genuine appeal, which implies that, rather than being ahead of his time, he was for all time. In that regard, I think Bob Ross is anti-hipster in word and deed alike.
HIPSTER@SDREADER.COM
in Mission Valley the other day, and I’m still having flashbacks from the sight of cars practically running each other over in a desperate bid to be first to the parked-out car park at the mall. And I didn’t even try to go shopping! Any good
ideas for last-minute, ironic, pop-culture-savvy gifts for the average holiday parties
this year? Preferably stuff I can get on Amazon? — CHRIS
Maybe some “Nasty Woman” T-shirts and Clinton campaign stickers? No? Too soon? Most years, there’s some redonkulous
gizmo that rides a tidal wave of ironic popularity to the forefront of global awareness. Unfortunately for 2016, the only thing this crappy year managed to do for us was kill off talented musicians and unfortunate gorillas. Twenty sixteen never got its Shakeweight. The best we can do is the exploding Galaxy Note 7. At least this year brought us the
Hipster Nativity scene from Modern Nativity. Probably too rich for the office white-elephant gift exchange, but worth considering nonetheless for the last-minute hipster shopper. Personally, I don’t understand the
Bob Ross
apoplectic fury arising from the bowels of popular resentment over the figurines, which por tray S egway-riding hi ps t er ma g i bestowing Amazon packages on a mid- selfie baby Jesus. I think it’s hilarious. My only regret is that I didn’t think
of it myself, which is probably the reason that people get so mad about stuff like this. They’re just jealous some cool hipster had a better idea than they did. Haters gonna hate. Me, I think I’m just going to skip the
whole gift-giving thing this year. I’m over it, already thinking about New Year’s Eve, and ready for 2017. Bring it on, Year that Couldn’t Possibly be Any Less Funny or Enjoyable Than This One! I’ll be ready. Let’s get a head start on the Valentine’s Day decorations.
— DJ Stevens
San Diego Reader December 15, 2016 11
18 San Diego Reader December 15, 2016
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