FAN CLUB Chief Fan Ambassador introduces ‘The Hacks’
dor. Reich is working hard to get “T e Hacks” off the ground and he needs your help. T e Hacks is the offi cial “un- offi cial” fan group for the sport of curl- ing in the United States. Our mission is clear: “To support the sport of curling in the United States through a unifi ed and dedicated group of fans.” We want to show that we are proud to
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be Americans and curling fans – and to help support the growth and success of curling in the United States. We will be be loud. We will stand,
sing, and cheer on our curlers. We will welcome all fans. We will provide guid-
Brian Reich Chief Fan Ambassador rocket exhaust Top 10 Signs T at Your Skip, Mark Watney, May Be A
Former NASA Astronaut Who Was Rescued Aſt er Being Stranded Alone on the Surface of the Planet Mars
A column by Richard Maskel 10] Spends way too much time in the locker room putting on that
bulky and cumbersome space suit uniform that he loves to wear. 9] His pre-game meal always consists of organic potatoes, ketchup,
and a dash of Vicodin. 8] Shot selections are signaled to teammates using a completely
arcane hexadecimal alphabet communication system. 7] Has an irritating habit of referring to a “T ree Day Bonspiel” as
a “T ree Sol Bonspiel.” 6] Listens exclusively to 80s disco music on the way to the curling
club even though he professes to dislike it intensely. 5] Keeps threatening to design a brush head that can more effi -
ciently “warm the ice” by building in small amounts of decaying plu- tonium-238. 4] Seems overly fond of playing with the “red rocks” due to some
strange fi xation he has on that color. 3] Claims that the circles on the sheet should actually be known as
“the habitat” instead of the “the house.” 2] Some mid-game bathroom breaks tend to be unduly long as the
result of his peculiar habit of meticulously vacuum-sealing all solid waste products. 1] Repeatedly insists that he can solve every tactical problem on the ice by simply “sciencing the hell out of it.”
n October, Brian Reich of New York City was named USA Curl- ing’s fi rst Chief Fan Ambassa-
ance and support to help fans get the most out of their curl- ing experience, and to help attract new interest and new support among fans. We will become a community of fans dedicated to supporting our team. You ready to be a Hack? brian@littlemmedia. information
Email com for more
or visit
www.facebook.com/ WeAreT eHacks. In the next magazine, we will tell you a little bit more about the work
Brian will be doing as Chief Fan Ambassador, and Brian, himself. (No, he’s not being paid, he’s just very enthused!) Q
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usacurl.org ))
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