cautious. Equanimity, although very pleasant, requires an extreme lightness of touch. I know that I am no longer doing meditation; meditation is now doing me. However, I am not out of the woods yet.
In equanimity, any ‘efforting’ will spin me right back into the worst and last of the dark night stages called ‘re-observation’. ‘Re-observation’ is the stage just after ‘desire for deliverance’, where I was begging for relief. Re-observation feels like I am in a tumble dryer with nothing to hold onto, and is full of misery, fear, and disgust for company. It takes me months to really stop
‘doing’. I bounce from equanimity to re-observation and back again over and over and over again. Finally something lets go.
Meditation diary, excerpt Nov 2015: Click. I have what I call a ‘drop out’. Something pulled the life plug out of my body/mind. My whole body collapses for a split second, like a telephone gone dead.
Something has shifted. I feel incredible joy. Everything is so obvious. All is abundantly clear. Life - this dear, beautiful, precious, wonderful life - is still happening, but not to anybody.
FACING THE DARK NIGHT While it is true that the dark night phase can take many forms, for serious meditators it is not optional. Many experiencing the dark night make the classic mistake of stopping meditation. But if you stop now, you run the risk of becoming a chronic dark night yogi. There are so many meditators (and
some non-meditators) stuck in the dark night that this is now a serious worldwide problem. Sadly, many meditation teachers don’t know how to assist. Fortunately, Associate Professor Willoughby Britton of Brown University is addressing this problem. Dr Britton is currently engaged in a research project examining the dark night experiences. She anticipates her research will develop methods to provide yogis the relief they need.
As one who has endured and successfully traversed the dark night many times over, please heed this advice. First, get a map of the territory so you know what to expect and, more importantly, what you are getting yourself into. Second, find an experienced meditation teacher/adviser who has successfully surfed this territory. With the right methods and guidance, the dark night does indeed end and the rewards are infinite.
“Better not to begin. Once you begin better to finish.” [Chögyam Trungpa] ■
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www.livingnow.com.au
Dr Jeannet Weijers is a minor mystic, registered psychologist, hypnotherapist, meditation and spiritual advisor.
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