ISSUE S
Children, cars, choices
by Emma Stephens, communicator, creator, celebrator and CEO
THERE ARE MANY aspects to my not being a mother which impact on me; some every day, some just occasionally. Some are quite easy to sail past, while others floor me for a while… Then I pick myself up, and keep going through my life, making the best of the wonderful world around me.
who aren’t biological mothers to have a voice. I’ll share just one snippet.
I’m grateful for this opportunity for those of us
She got out of her van, full of seats for all her children and their friends, and looked at me with contempt.
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She told me how I ‘had changed’, and that she didn’t know if she wanted to be my friend since I was making ‘irresponsible choices’ such as buying my beautiful two-seater convertible.
I don’t remember what I said – something deflated – I do remember how I *wanted* to respond though: I wanted to scream out all my pain of being childless. I wanted to yell that if I couldn’t have the
beauty and wonder and fulfilment that so many people say motherhood provides, surely I was allowed to enjoy the freedom that having no children brings?!? It was a ‘small’ moment in an already
fraught friendship. However it etched itself into me. I’m not sure that anyone who IS a mother will get what it’s like to feel judged or shunned for choices that those of us who aren’t mothers make… I guess I’m hoping that more people
will understand that it can be very hard to not have children – even for those of us who have learnt to find many of the good aspects.
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www.gengtleearthwalking.com.au sueandon@gentleearthwalking.com.au
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