by jizzona straynger & lady vajayjay It’s February and love is in the air. Oh wait, I think it’s just the stench of failed
relationships and bitterness from last year’s failures. Actually, it’s just the odor coming from the one and only Lady VaJayJay. That’s right dear readers, I’m scooting over to share The Rage Monthly stage with my sister and dear friend. We had a great time catching up in January and making the rounds in Los Angeles and Orange County. From men, to shows, to a couple really fun photo shoots—we definitely had our hands full. Lady VaJayJay: Well hello doll-face, thanks for the moist welcome toRage!
I’d like to take a hot second to thank the people, many of whom are Rage readers, who have supported me through my rough pregnancy, I mean career! There’s a lot of hate out there, and as I always say, “Go around them,
not through them; keep your dollar dear.” Jizzona:We didn’t come by this beauty and talent, or lack thereof easily by any
stretch! I guess we should start by telling everyone a bit about how we came to be and got our start terrorizing Orange County and Los Angeles? Lady VaJayJay: It’s a crazy story for sure! We both started with a fundraiser in
Orange County at this closet case lesbian bar in Santa Ana called Durty Nelly’s. Jizzona: Not so much in the closet now thanks to your flappers. I was forced to
perform with VaJayJay and a handful of other first-time queens. We were such a hit that we were asked to come back every other week and perform on Sundays. Our first shows were all fund-raisers for various local causes in the O.C. From there we got our own show on Sunday nights in Long Beach at that Hamburger something. Lady VaJayJay: That’s when you’d fall and bust your ass on stage at least once
in a show! Mess girl, mess. We’ve definitely come a long ways in our three years together, and we’ve raised a lot of money for a lot of great causes! Jizzona: Before we get to all of our upcoming plans for February, I must share
with you this funny story about one of the gals from the show Real Housewives of Atlanta. I hope you all know what a big reality TV whore I am! In fact, I’m hop- ing some producer out there sees what a fun mess of entertainment a pilot drag queen would be for primetime TV! I was shopping at H&M at the Atlantic Station in Atlanta, the same place where
Kim got her weave snatched off her head a few seasons ago. The place was dead, just me and a black lady who I didn’t recognize—she had a rather large stack of clothes checking out. Since it was quite early in the morning there was only one register open. The clerk was doing her job, scanning all the clothes, while the customer was getting her panties in a wad. After the clothes were scanned, the clerk began clipping all the tags off the clothes. Apparently that’s special service for TV personalities, I’m not quite sure. After all the clothes were bagged, the customer got in the clerk’s face, grabbed
the receipt from the cash register, and told her, “YOU ARE SLOW!!! I’ve never had to wait this long to get my clothes.” Without skipping a beat, my mouth opened with, “You are such a bitch!” She looked at me and waved her finger at me and said, “You don’t know who you are messing with!” I had a legally blonde moment and I threw attitude back her. I told her, “Honey, you don’t know who you’re messing with! If I were to ever act like a frigid bitch like you, I’d at least try not to look so constipated!” She had the nerve to tell me that I need to learn some manners and grabbed her bags and left. Of course having to have the last word, I responded, “Sweetie, if my momma heard me talk the way you just did to that clerk, I would’ve been slapped at least twice, and I’m 30 years old.” While finishing my own shopping, the clerk told me I’d been having words with
the one and only Sheree from the Real Housewives of Atlanta. Oh snap! All I need now is Nene to be waiting for me outside. Lady VaJayJay: Making friends wherever you go I see, Jizzona! Jizzona: I aim to please. So Lady, what about you? What do you have going on
in February? 64 RAGERAGE monthly | FEBRUARY 2012 monthly | FEBRUARY 2012 Lady VaJayJay: Where should I begin? I’ve recently relocated to the heart of
WeHo! I’m enjoying my new neighborhood and my neighbors, if you know what I mean! Every Tuesday you can catch me like a bad case of the clap at VLVT Lounge in Santa Ana hosting Karaoke Night at Velvet Lounge with Karen Cobb. On Sunday, February 26, come out to Johnny G’s in Temecula for Vivacious
hosted by Big Dee with Atri and Twiggy Warhol. Vivacious is a monthly show held on the last Sunday of the month. Also, for the gays who like a good road trip, Victorville, CA is the go-to location for fierce drag! Coming in late February, Jizzona and I will be at Ricky’s hosting Ricky’s Dolls. Jizzona: Big Dee is the hottest thing since sliced bread; she’s got an ass on her
for days! Lady VaJayJay: I’ll also be joining
swoopsworld.com, an online radio show. I
will be sharing the seat with Connie Harris onThursday, February 2 at noon. You can call in and talk to me live during the show! Don’t miss it.! Well Jizzona, what are your plans for Valentine’s Day? Jizzona:Considering my New Year’s resolution was giving up on love, my plans include borrowing your VIP pass to the free clinic, cuz honey I plan on some seri- ous action! Lady VaJayJay: I wouldn’t expect anything less from you tramp! Since it is February, the month of romance and all that jazz, remember to wrap it
before you tap it— seriously! Safe sex saves lives, so know your status! I’d like to welcome once again my sister and friend, Lady VaJayJay! We have lots
of exciting things happening from Orange County to Los Angeles, with new live shows, TV appearances and more! Be sure to add us both on Facebook and visit our websites for all the latest!
CONDOMS AND CONTRACEPTION,
Jizzona Straynger & Lady VaJayJay
Jizzona.com Ladyvajayjay.com
ADVENTURES photography by Sue Cassidy
JIZZONA & LADY VAJAYJAY’S
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