others for not advocating euthanasia, for maybe feeding Beth false hope; his professional ethics were questioned. He may have lost cli- ents. But Beth’s perspective is diff erent: “He saw in Bela a desire to live; he marveled at what a good patient she was, and he took as much time as she needed – or as I needed – on every visit. One barn call could easily turn into 3-4 hours, but he always stayed, quiet and comforting.” Still, Beth struggled with the questions of what the future was going to bring, what she wanted for Bela, what was “the best” thing to do for Bela. She struggled with the expectations of disapprov- ing loved ones. Fall moved into winter, but on one particularly cold, bitter February day, Beth found peace. T ere was nothing dramatic about it. “I just stopped asking for the way I wanted things to turn out, and just asked for the best for Bela.” Up until that point, the vet had to convince Beth each day to just deal with “today.” Now, Beth had found that place within her that allowed her to take it one day at a time. Still the vigil continued, as did the criticism and judgment. As did
the vet visits. But now, there was no plan, and no attempt or impulse to create a plan. Nothing to analyze, no list to check off . Bela and Beth, in the true taoist sense, just “were.” Day by day. Spring turned into summer; the calendar rotated a full year. A
routine had sprung up: Bela in her stall, stall door open (really, where was she going to go, she couldn’t walk). At the busy farm where Bela resides, boarders would make Bela’s stall their fi rst stop upon arrival. A carrot, an apple, or just a pet on the nose. Muckers mucked around
her. T e dogs or cats would come in and sit with Bela. Just sit and be as only dogs and cats can do. And then, one day in late summer, on her own and with no provo-
cation, with no one even paying attention, Bela hobbled out of her stall, out of the barn, to a patch of grass and started grazing, her con- cerned canine corps keeping a watchful eye. And that was it. Bela, and Beth, had reached the other side of “not today.” Now Beth could know “and not tomorrow, either.” Although it is Christmas time, this is not a story about the power of faith or believing in miracles. Beth didn’t have faith, nor would she call Bela’s recovery a miracle. Bela is not going to the Olympics. Disney is not going to make a movie. Fractured relationships will not be healed. Bela, for now, is comfortable but clumsy and slow, and most likely will stay that way. If she had economic value before, she has none now. T e riding partnership Beth and Bela were building is over. Bela has no “purpose” in her life other than to just “be.” T is is a story about Beth and Bela, about living a crisis one day at a
time. T is about how a planner stops planning and starts just being. For many Equiery readers, 2011 culminates a series of economically tough years and unplanned life changes, despite all our careful plan- ning and rational goals. Our Equiery wish for our readers this season is very simple: We
wish you peace of mind and a happy holiday – one holiday at a time. - Crystal Brumme Kimball, publisher (December 2011)
Happy Holidays One holiday at a time
MA MARYLAND LAND COMBINED TRAINING ASSOCIATION
Celebrating 40 EVENTful years in 2012 Annual Banquet
& Year End Awards January 14, 2012 Summit Manor, Hereford -
at SHAWAN DOWNS May 5-6, 2012 Cockeysville -
MCTA HT
MCTA JENNY CAMP HT October 28, 2012
Tranquility Manor, Monkton -
Leslie Bertram
www.equiery.com | 800-244-9580
MCTA Starter HT June 4, 2012
Name_______________________D.O.B.__________ Farm Name (if applicable)________________________ Address ____________________________________ Email ______________________________________ Phone _____________________________________ Make checks payable to MCTA. Mail application with payment to: MCTA Membership, c/o Christy Weikert 10801 Gambril Dr., Apt 33, Manassas, VA 20109 Contact Christy at
cmwmcta@gmail.com
Visit
www.MDCTA.com for information & download detailed membership application. DECEMBER 2011 | THE EQUIERY | 13
JOIN MCT
JOIN MCTA for a year full of fun-or a year full of fun Givethe giftthat lasts allyear long
e the gift that lasts all year long!
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842273-111211
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