INDULGENCES outrageous by jizzona straynger
equally loved and hated Hallmark-holiday known as Valentine’s Day. To start, every last, single flippin’ man (and by man I mean every 12-year-old trapped in a 38-year-old’s body I’ve ever dated) has fallen ridiculously short of the finish line when it came to Valentine’s Day. I’m an old-fashioned kind of gal (if you hadn’t figured that one out yet); I like to be wined and dined, made love to—all while respecting the hair! Give me a man who will take charge and show he cares! All too often I think wela- dies allow the goofballs we call “partners” to get away with far too much! Valentine’s Day shouldn’t be celebrated on just one single day of the year. Love should be consistently expressed between two people who have decided to try and make a bond (even if it requires a little “Gun Oil” to secure the prize). Valentine’s Day has a variety of meanings and is expressed in many different ways depending on the individual. Valentine’s Day, to some, means working as a flight at- tendant with a man at the end of every runway (ah-hem, Lori) to ensure that all her bases are covered on important days like Valentine’s Day. To those who are a little more traditional, it means a stroll over to the bathhouse to cruise for the catch of the night (not mentioning any names, Wayne). Let’s just hope the catch of the night doesn’t require a trip to the free clinic! To a lot of single ladies out there, Valentine’s Day is a day of revolt and rebellion. Just
last year my sister Aunt Phyllis Dean and I hosted an Anti-Valentine’s Day Valentine’s Party—It was a hit! Nothing like a bunch of bitter queens, sitting around drinking their love sorrows away with other miserable souls. They say misery loves company, and there was no shortage of miserable company. Regardless of what your flavor is for Valentine’s Day, I’ve got just the solutions you need to show Mr. or Miss Right—or Right Now—a good time on Valentine’s Day this year! For dining options, I recommend the sexy Geisha House in Santa Ana, the romantic
ADVENTURES JIZZONA STRAYNGER’S Love is in the air!...oh wait, no, no, that’s just the smell of my cheap, “cubed” merlot
here in my shady hotel room in Columbia, South Carolina. I’m sitting here having some wine and pondering all things sex, love and rock and roll. That’s right poodles; I’m talk- ing about Valentine’s Day. But before I discuss all things V-Day, I must catch everyone up on what’s going on in and around L.A./Orange County! New Year’s Eve was a hoot in Huntington Beach at Ibiza Bar and Nightclub. I hosted
the evening to a sold-out crowd! Many regulars made appearances as well as some new faces from San Diego and Los Angeles. I was worried about getting my kiss at midnight, but to my surprise I had a line waiting to get a piece of my luscious lady lips! If you are still holding out on checking out the O.C.’s newest craze, you need to get on it! You will love the casual and friendly environment, as well as awesome entertainment nightly at Ibiza. Tuesday, January 11 marked a new vision for nightlife in San Diego. Eden, located
in Hillcrest, at the same location Universal called home for over a year, held its grand opening. They featured a full-service higher-end restaurant, a stunning garden patio bar and a posh club with a trendy vibe. Eden is a truly versatile establishment where you can eat, talk, drink and dance! February marks the holiday celebrating love and affection between intimate com- panions. I have to say that one thing I don’t understand about Valentine’s Day is why they made the mascot a Cupid! Nothing screams romance like a short, chubby toddler coming at me with a sharp weapon. I digress; let’s take a little time to talk about this
Café Piccolo in Long Beach, and lavish Bungalow Club in Los Angeles. After dinner, get tickets to see Hershey Felder’s Great American Songbook at the Laguna Beach Playhouse. For something a little different, check out the Venice Beach Annual Valentine’s Day Scavengers Hunt! Register online at
outoftheboxevents.net. February is going to be a busy month for me! On top of my regular traveling for my
day job, I’m kicking off Jizzona’s Big Hair Bingo Ball Bouncing Tour with shows sched- uled in four states! Stay tuned to my Facebook and
Jizzona.com for more information! The first event will be held March 12 benefiting AIDS Lifecycle. Last year we raised over $14,000 and gave away cruises, fierce trips, scenic flights and a crap-tastic array of other fabulous prizes. Oh, and I forgot to mention open bar! You don’t want to miss it! RSVP at
events@jizzona.com or by dialing 61.JIZZONA.1 (615.499.6621). February 18-20 will mark the first ever; Big Bear’s Unofficial-Official Gay Ski Week-
end. Nothing says fabulous like a bunch of gays with poles in their hands, snowballing down a mountain. Register by February 11 at
events@jizzona.com or calling 61.JIZ- ZONA.1 (615.499.6621). That’s a wrap! I leave you all with this definition of love: A wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker. If you want to make this Valentine’s Day really special, try tying up your partner, grabbing the remote and having your way with the television! Catch me on
BabbleOnPodCast.com and subscribe to us for free in iTunes! Follow
me on Twitter @Jizzona,
Facebook.com/Jizzona or e-mail a lady for once at jizzona@
jizzona.com! Until next month poodles, toodle-loo!
xoxo Jizzona
jizzona.com + Twitter: @Jizzona + Facebook: /jizzona
Be sure to sign up for The Rage Monthly’s e-blast to stay connected with all that is going on in O.C./L.A. at
ragemonthly.com !
photography by Dennis Covey
coveyeditions.com
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RAGE monthly | FEBRUARY 2011
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