LIVE LOVE LEGACY: KATE BENSON 8TOP TIPS FOR YOU AND YOUR TEENS
Kate Benson has years of coaching, mentoring and being a mother and grandmother. Her courses on parenting and teaching give her the opportunity to really address the fundamentals of the parent-child relationship.
In Part One of her article on getting the best out of your family, she gives 8 immediately useful tips - 4 each for the parent and the teen - to really make a difference. www.meta-nlp.co.uk
Relax!
Parents: You have probably found yourself getting wound up about the mess in the bedroom, the grunting communication, the cries of ‘everyone else is going to the party’, etc. Remember is that the teenage years are limited. In a few years your teen will be a responsive, loving, reasonable human being again, just like when they were 11. All you need to do is wait!
Teens: Sure, parents are un-cool and embarrassing and all your friends’ parents are much cooler. However, just remember your parents love you and want the best for you. It won’t be long before you are an adult. Just wait a while and everything will be OK.
I have spent a great deal of time helping parents navigate the trials and tribulations of the teenage years with their children. I also spend a great deal of time helping teenagers navigate the trials and tribulations of having parents!
These tips are not designed for the few parents and teenagers who have serious problems in their relationships and lives. It is designed to help you realise that you love your child and your child loves you. Read them together or separately, depending on how you feel. Perhaps you will gain an insight into what is going on for each of you.
Remember who’s who!
Parents: You set the boundaries, so decide what rules are absolutely immovable and stick to them, though some will change as you gradually relinquish responsibilities. Remember that you don’t have the right to yell, scream or ask your teen ‘how do you think I feel?’ You are the parent, after all!
Teens: We all know you’re testing the boundaries as much as it’s your parents’ job to set them and keep you safe. If you genuinely think it’s time they moved the boundaries, create a reasoned and balanced case and be prepared to discuss this without trading, threatening or stomping off!