THE NORTH AMERICAN DIVISION HAS GIVEN SOME QUALIFIED SUPPORT FOR THE ACCEPTANCE OF THOSE WHO IDENTIFY AS LGBTQ—BUT NOT IN RELATIONSHIPS. YET, ALONG THE WAY YOU GOT MARRIED TO TAYLOR.
We have three marriage dates, and they’re all July 23! Te first was shortly aſter we met, before marriage was legal, but we felt we were married in God’s eyes. Te second was July 23, 2000, when civil unions became legal in Vermont; we were one of the first couples to get married there. Ten, in July 2008, California opened a brief window to legal gay marriage, and we jumped at that opportunity to make it fully legal! Te day before we were due to be married in 2008 (aſter we
had made all of the arrangements—my son had come from Europe, and my daughter was here, the cake and food had been ordered, all the preparations had been made), the conference found out, and they were upset. Oddly, they hadn’t been upset when it was just a non-legal coupling, but now that it was going to become legal in California, they thought this might set a precedent. Pastor Rudy Torres was going to marry us, and he was told that he couldn’t. He would have his ministerial credentials revoked and I would be forbidden to ever participate in Glendale City’s church life again, if the wedding went ahead. I told Rudy, “Tis is not a hill worth dying on.” We couldn’t
cancel the wedding, since everything has been prepared and paid for, so Taylor and I suggested that we make it just a celebratory occasion but legally non-binding, so the conference would be satisfied. But Rudy replied, “No, this is the right thing to do, and I
will do it, whatever happens!” I take my hat off to him—it was incredibly brave of him. And once again, the Glendale City church board came to the rescue, as they have so many times over the years. Tey went to the conference and said, “Listen, you have to allow this wedding to go ahead. What is going to change? Nothing is going to be different. Tis wedding is just a happy occasion between two people who’ve decided to stay together the rest of their lives.” And so, the conference gave in and we got married by Pastor Torres.
I HAVE ALREADY MENTIONED HOW IMPRESSED I WAS THAT THESE ELDERLY PEOPLE KNEW YOU WERE A MARRIED GAY MAN AND SPECIFICALLY ASKED YOU TO DO THE FUNERAL FOR THEIR LOVED ONE. WAS ANYONE UNAWARE OF THAT AS YOU MINISTERED TO THE CHURCH?
No one was unaware. Everyone knew I was a caring pastor, and they invited me to be with them in their most personal spiritual moments.
RECENTLY YOU’VE RETIRED?
Aſter Pastor Todd Leonard leſt, I filled in with preaching, along with guest speakers such as Greg Nelson and others. I did the visitation and kept the church board going and everything else running—or appointed someone else to do what I couldn’t. Finally, we got a new senior pastor, Uriel Herinirina, who asked me to stay a few extra months while he settled in.
The Glendale City Church congregation made a unanimous decision: if the conference wasn’t going to hire Pastor Leif, they would!
My departure day was the first Sabbath in February, and it
was a two-hour sendoff. It was, for me and I think for most people, very moving. Tere were, amongst others, tributes from four Southern California Conference officials, who thanked me warmly for my years of service at Glendale City Church. Some appeared in person, and those who weren’t sent video tributes. All I can say is that I felt a lot of strong emotions inside me at the time!
WHAT AN AFFIRMATION! I’VE OFTEN SAID THAT KNOWING PEOPLE AS FRIENDS IS THE BEST THING TO ELIMINATE PREJUDICE. IT CHANGES THE WHOLE DYNAMIC.
I believe that my ministry has been a miracle, far beyond what I could have expected. I have retired from a church family, but that church family will actually never leave me—and I will never leave them. Tey’re not just parishioners; they are friends. Glendale City’s new senior pastor assured me that there would be no problem should a member prefer to have me perform a wedding or a baptism or a funeral for them. I’ll be quite honest; I would never have believed there was a
possibility of doing what I have done these last 20 years, since I came out. It would have seemed so unlikely that this could happen when I arrived at Glendale City in 2004—that I would do what God had called and allowed me to do these 20 years! It is a miracle I do not take for granted that I, as a married gay man, would be as warmly regarded by both congregation and conference, as I am today.
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