Despite successfully freezing 19 embryos it became clear that it wouldn’t be an option for her to carry one herself and the couple were given fairly low odds of conceiving.
Emma, who works part-time at West Midlands Police, said: “Before I started my chemotherapy I knew pretty early on from doing lots of reading that 99% of the time it kills your fertility. Because it kills every cell in your body, I pretty much knew that it would kill all my eggs. So I was really clear with my consultant around asking the questions about fertility before I started chemo. I know, retrospectively not everyone gets that choice. It’s a postcode lottery. A lot of the consultants, depending on where you are in the country, won't even give you the opportunity to do any sort of fertility treatment.”
“Everything happened so fast but, if anything, it's a good thing because you don’t have time to get your head around it.”
As Emma battled her condition and its debilitating side effects, the IVF plans were paused by the pandemic’s first full lockdown, also coinciding with the death of Emma’s beloved father from leukaemia two days prior. The pair had been facing their cancer journeys together.
She recalls: “Dad and I were going through chemo together so it was a really difficult time. I was so worried about him as well. It seems weirdly morbid, but it actually helped having dad so poorly, because I'm so close to him, and worried about him, everything was focused on him.
“I remember we got the call the day before the first lockdown to say dad's not well, all of his vital signs were wrong. The bone marrow transplant just wasn't taking, they were pumping him full of drugs. It was horrendous to see him like that. But we were there as a family at the end and I got so much comfort from that.”
As the country re-emerged from lockdown, plans resumed, and a short procedure at a private clinic was followed by an agonising two-week wait – which Emma describes as the longest of her life. But it finally brought the news everyone had been praying for.
“I hadn’t wanted to ask Laura if she felt pregnant and she didn't want to tell me because she didn't want to get our hopes up. So we just didn't really talk about it much. But when you ask her now, she says she felt pregnant.”
She added: “From the day we had the news, I think that's where the worry then really started for me. Until the day Ella was born I was like a pit of worry, it was horrendous. I refused to buy any baby clothes until the 20-week scan because I was just so nervous. I remember she would give me weekly updates and a photo of her bump because, again, we couldn't see each other due to lockdown. I was determined not to pester her too much.
“She was 39 when she had Ella, the same age as me now. It was classed as a geriatric pregnancy. She put herself at massive risk. Her family – she already had two young daughters - had to be on hold, but everyone was supportive.”
At 10.10pm on November 3rd 2021, Thomas cut the cord following the birth of their miracle baby, who was then handed to Emma.
“It was the most magical surreal experience to see your own baby born, and I can't describe how I felt about Laura in that moment. The love you feel for that person who's given you this gift, is really hard to describe. And then there is all this emotion I had for this baby. We held her for a while, then we give her to Laura for a bit.”
The two couples spent an emotional night sharing cuddles with their precious newborn before she was taken home by Emma and Thomas to her forever home. But it was to be six weeks before for a parental order was granted to legally name them as Ella’s parents on the birth certificate.
Five years on from diagnosis, Emma never takes a single day for granted as she continues to be in remission for cancer and is proud of the special relationship Laura and three-year-old Ella now also share. Emma said: “At no point did Laura ever become attached or we had any disagreements. I knew she'd be absolutely fine the whole way and when I look at her now with Ella it’s a really special bond.
“Laura is like my guardian angel. That's the only way I can describe it. You can't love anyone any more when they've done something this remarkable. I feel very, very lucky to have her and for Ella to have a really special aunty.
“I never at any point worried that it might affect our friendship. I wouldn't have let everyone in my life do it. But I knew she could do it because she's just that sort of person and from the very beginning she would say she always felt about the baby as if she was just the oven.
“She always said, from the very beginning, what kept her going was the thought of seeing us walk out of the hospital with a baby. Not everyone could do it, it takes a very special sort of person indeed.”
WHAT CATHERINE SAYS: “Emma has faced profound challenge, love, loss, illness, and the pursuit of hope with remarkable grit and resolve. Her insights were not just inspiring; they were transformative. Subsequently, they still prompt deep thought on what truly matters, the depths of love and friendship. It’s the act of selflessness of her friend, that underscores the power of courage, kindness, and humanity. She left an indelible impact on me, and I have no doubt her story will resonate with all who encounter it.”
You can follow Catherine Williamson’s Gobsmacked podcast at
https://gobsmacked.me/ The book accompanying her podcast is available to purchase
LIVE24-SEVEN.COM 91
ENTERTAINMENT CATHERINE WI L L IAMSON
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