Here is what I learned: “Smart” skills are must have “Permission to Play” skills “Healthy” leadership and soft skills make things happen Either skill set by itself is useless. You need both.
is a quest and I fail often.
Today I dipped into my tool kit and pulled out a technique authored frustration and, perhaps, produce a productive new path forward. I will, also, sprinkle in a few other of my own Yoda like words of wisdom.
Te academic and practical sources of this commentary are cited at the end. I heartily recommend you add those cited sources to your Leadership Library. Obtain them. Read them. Learn them. Integrate their teachings into your life as if your emotional health and leadership success depends upon it. Because, they do.
On the surface, the stuff we are going to explore here appears simple. However, do not be fooled. Te actual learning and integrating it into can expect to achieve with these tools is to improve our batting average. Tere will always be the impossible individual or group. Tey require more industrial strength solutions then presented here.
One more scene setting item and we will get started.
I have a core belief that most people do not do well with interpersonal conflict, not because they don’t care. Tey simply don’t know how. War on one end and Artificial Harmony on the other. and directors tend to seek Artificial Harmony:
Can’t we all just get along? Don’t anybody raise their voice! Play well with others.
I suggest to you that both extremes are dysfunctional and ineffective strategies. Whereas, somewhere in the middles lies Productive Conflict that - nothing changes or improves without some type of conflict. Learn
Here is an all too familiar exchange I hear out there between community
FO: “I am mad as h#l* about XXXX and what are you going to do
rule is…; We sent you multiple notices about…; Your idea (thought, or passive aggressive responses that invalidates the FO’s position or person.
Tis cycle repeats in some form or another 22 Step 1 - ASK:
bristle word. It must be repackaged.
What is it about that (concept, belief, idea, posi-
How Because (back end) If I understand you correctly,
Additional understand…
Te perfect open-ended question
Step 2 - LISTEN:
Listen and play back what you think they said
Step 3 - EMPATHIZE and/or REINFORCE:
shoes, I can see what that would be like. I can certainly see why that is so important to you. I can see why you are so both- ered. Tat outcome surprised you. Living in an
Reinforce: I see how that makes sense to you. I think you are right on track. Tat is brilliant
The Recipe-The
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