ations at home? Tere are many reasons it may be difficult for a child to access skills we know they have or to learn new ones. Te second is acknowledging that be-


haviour is communication. When a child is struggling, we look at them with curious eyes and ask ourselves questions like, “What do we know about this child?” and, “What is this child trying to tell us?” Tese questions help educators brainstorm as they begin to problem solve and develop a plan to support a child who is struggling. Tey also help us remember that children are still learning and it’s our job as adults to approach them with open hearts and open minds. Te final pillar of our approach stems


from an oſt-quoted line from Kids Tese Days by Jody Carrington, a Canadian psy- chologist who specializes in trauma integra- tion: “Every time you hear yourself say, that kid is ‘attention seeking,’ replace it with that kid is ‘connection seeking,’ and watch your perspective change.” Te first time we heard this, it rocked our


worlds because of how many times as new educators we heard the phrase “ignore them, they’re just looking for attention.” For us, that


12 ETFO VOICE | WINTER 2024


never felt like a solution because it didn’t feel like it addressed the problem. And while, yes, sometimes there are behaviours that we don’t want to reinforce or acknowledge, it never felt right to ignore the child altogether. If we believe that behaviour is communication, we can recognize that while the behaviour a child is exhibiting can be frustrating or dis- ruptive, it is also how the child is desperately trying to communicate a need that they don’t know how to articulate any other way. Each of these three pillars guide our prac-


tices when we are working with all kids but are particularly important when we are sup- porting students with challenging behaviour. When we work with these students, we try to first approach them with curiosity: What do we know about this child? What was their morning like? Do they struggle at a particu- lar time of day? What are the triggers that present a unique challenge for this student? Next, we work to identify the skills that


the child is missing or that are lagging. Is the child who is hitting others doing it because they are angry all the time? Or are they try- ing to enter play but lack the communication skills to do so appropriately? Are they over-


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