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COUNTRY LIFE IN BC • FEBRUARY 2020 Junkyard Frank’s plan is played to perfection When we left off last time,


Junkyard Frank’s secret plan to wine and dine Susan Henderson was in full throttle. Susan and Ashley had spent most of the afternoon shopping for a new dress and Susan arrived at the restaurant at five after six expecting to be greeted by Newt Pullman. Instead, she sat alone, sipping a glass of water. Rural Redemption, Part 119, continues...


Woodshed


Chronicles by BOB COLLINS


The waiter at the Seaside


Rendezvous Restaurant asked Susan Henderson if she would like something while she was waiting. She thanked him, no, and glanced at her watch: quarter to seven and still no sign of Newt. Where could he be, she wondered. She was startled by a voice from behind. “Mrs. Henderson, is that


you?” Susan turned and looked


over her shoulder. “I thought I recognized


you. What are you doing here, all dressed up and sitting in the shadows?” “Frank?” “You’re surprised, I can see.” “A little, yes. I’m waiting for someone who’s joining me. What brings you here?” “Well, truth is, I like to haul


out my best bib and tucker and get away from my own cooking every once in a while, though I have to say it doesn’t happen nearly as much since


Mil’s been gone.” “Mil?” “Mildred, my wife.” “I’m sorry, Frank. How long


have you been on your own? “Goin’ on 20 years now,”


said Frank. “Lonely years, too, if you know what I mean. Never anyone in the house to talk to except the dog.” Susan nodded. “So, it looks like whoever


you’re waiting for is running late. Would you mind if I sat in and kept you company until they get here?” asked Frank. Susan said that she


didn’t want Frank to change his plans on her account and Frank said


he wouldn’t feel like any kind of a gentleman at all if he left her sitting there all alone in such a pretty dress. Susan checked her watch


again. It was nearly seven and there was no sign of Newt. Frank pulled out a chair and sat across the table and said they might-as-well have a glass of wine while they were waiting.


Susan watched as he snapped his fingers to catch the waiter’s attention. Her eyes were drawn to the storks with iridescent green beaks that were embroidered on his tie. There were sickly green coloured ones that appeared to be dive bombing the silver ones that were guarding their nestlings in one of the gold trees. The green storks were a perfect colour match to Frank’s new pickle green shirt. The tie was clamped firmly to the shirt by a magnificent copper souvenir from the 1962 Seattle World’s Fair.


There was a wad of tissue paper stuck to the shaving nick on Frank’s chin and he was tugging at his shirt collar. The waiter appeared and


Frank ordered two glasses of the best house red. He turned to Susan. “I sure hope the fool you’re


waiting for knows what he’s missing.” “What makes you think it’s


a he, and why would you call him a fool?” asked Susan. “Well, someone new to the neighbourhood, all dressed up and waiting in the fanciest restaurant in town has most likely been asked there on a date, and only a fool would pass up a chance at spending the evening with a beautiful lady like you.” Frank raised his glass in silent tribute. Susan raised her glass and clinked it with Frank’s. “That’s a very interesting tie


clip.” “Yeah, it’s from the World’s


Fair in Seattle.” “Were you there?” “Nah. I’ve never been to


Seattle. Mil got it at a garage sale for 75 cents when we were first married. She got this tie there, too.” “Well, they go together


very nicely, and they must be a special memory of her.” “I suppose,” said Frank as he


gazed down at the tiny space needle on the tie clip. At 7:30, Frank said that Susan must be famished and he was starting to feel a little peckish himself, and whoever stood her up was probably no gentleman anyhow, and seeing’s how they were both there, why not have dinner


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together. Susan took a last look at her watch and said why not indeed. Frank asked her if she’d mind if he took his tie off because it was driving him nuts. He dislodged the tissue from his shaving nick when he wrestled the storks from around his neck. They left just before the


restaurant closed at 9. Frank insisted on paying, saying the only thing more pitiful than a man who would expect a lady to buy her own dinner was one who didn’t show up at all. He walked her to her car and she thanked him for the splendid meal. Frank said he hoped they could do it again sometime. Susan said goodnight.


vvv Christopher knocked at


Newt’s back door before 8 the next morning. “Hey, Chris. What brings


you here so early? Is everything okay in the barn?” “It’s all fine at the barn but


all hell’s breaking loose at home.” “What’s going on at


home?” “Ashley and Grandma are


super- hyped and mad.” “Mad about what?” “Not about what. About


you. They’re really mad at you.” “Why would Ashley or your Grandma be mad at me?” “Because you bailed on


your date with Grandma last night, and they bought a new dress for it, too.” “I didn’t bail on a date with


your Grandma.” “Well, that’s not the way


they’re telling it. I think you need to go over and talk to them. Watch out for Ashley though.” Five minutes later, Newt


knocked on the Henderson’s door. Ashley answered. “Good morning, Ashley, Chris tells me I’m in your bad books somehow.”


“I never would have guessed you could be such a jerk.”


“I wouldn’t have guessed it


myself. What’s happened?” “You’ve really hurt Grandma’s feelings.” “I have no idea how I might


have done that. Could I speak to her?” “I wouldn’t speak to you if I


was her.” “Look, I have no idea why


that would be. Try giving me a hint?” “Alright. You kissed


Grandma in the car when you came home from the picnic the other day, right?” “Did your Grandma tell you


that.” “No, she didn’t. Chris and I


saw you kiss her.” “I see. We kissed each


other, in fact. Why would that make her mad?” “Don’t you get it? You don’t


just kiss someone one day, then ask them out and bail on them the next.” “I’ll admit to kissing her, but


I didn’t ask her out and I didn’t bail on her.” “How do you explain this


then?” demanded Ashley, as she held out the florist’s card from Susan’s secret admirer. “I do admire your Grandma


– very much – but I didn’t send this card.” “Well, if it wasn’t you, who did send it?” “I have no idea Ashley,


honestly,” said Newt. “Well, Grandma was really


stoked about it and she bought a new dress and she waited for you for an hour. She was just lucky the Junkyard guy saw her there and had dinner with her.” “Junkyard guy? You mean


Frank?” “Yeah, Junkyard Frank.” “Okay. I need to speak to


your Grandma. I think I know what’s going on. And I think you’re going to owe me an apology.”


To be continued ....


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