fruit fly
by angelica osborne-hurd
All the guys who are
A STRAIGHT GIRL’S GAY HEART LOVE AND MY GBFS
I’ve had a life-long love affair with gay men. I’ve always said I’m a promiscuous gay man, trapped in a monogamous, straight woman’s body. You are all my favorites! We just have the most fun together: A wicked sense of humor, fashion and so down with the peen…Yes, please! All the guys who are trying so hard to prove they
are not a predator to women right now, could take a cue from gay men. They have always looked out for us. There is no telling how many times they have saved me from having even more #Metoo experi- ences. I recall my college bestie Brian taking a drink out of my hand and telling me, “Don’t drink that.” I had foolishly taken a drink from some weirdo we didn’t even know—who ended up being a big freak—that night could have gone so badly. Another time, my dear gay bestie, Steve warned
me to be careful with two different men I was “friends” with, because he thought they were gay... and guess what? He was right, both times. I at least had a warning and it helped me get out immediately,
38 RAGE monthly | FEBRUARY 2018
instead of sitting there frozen in shock. Gay men have also helped me read other men and
taught me what to look for in predators. Years ago when we had a pastor come out of the closet to us in a staff meeting, I jumped up, squealed, hugged him and shouted “Yay” and told him, “Now we can be closer.” I did it number one, because I embrace anyone who is speaking their truth and discovering their authentic self. And second, because I knew he had been struggling for a long time with something, I just didn’t know what. It changed the balance of our relationship, because even my own pastor couldn’t get past certain walls with me until I knew he was gay. I never take a chance, no matter who it is, because I’m always ready for any guy to whip it out and try to get me to do something. Something that would never happen with a true friend or a gay man. They are what keeps some women from having even more #Metoo experiences. It must be tough being a straight man these days. I get that a lot of them feel “under attack,” but truth be
trying so hard to prove they are not a predator to women right now, could take a cue from gay men. They have always looked out for us.”
told...I’m okay with it. It’s about f’ing time! They should be scared of getting busted, especially when they use their power as a weapon to victimize those with less authority, muscle mass or titleship. It’s for sure women’s turn to be in the power seats, as well as the LGBT community! Scoot over, bitches! I’m so tired of straight male dominance in the world. We’re coming through! Now don’t get me wrong, I of course, know some
really incredible straight guys and I’ve been mar- ried to one for 25 years, but in my experience sadly, gentlemen are often the exception and not the rule. I’m not talking about those who are exceptional here, I’m talking about the egomaniacs who think they are superior, merely based on chromosomes. I believe all good things come from God and, I thank God for my gay BFFs! Yes, did you all hear that? I THANK GOD FOR MY GAYS!
Happy Valentines to all of you… I love you with all my heart.
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