THE AMATEUR PARKER … BY MELISSA BEAN STERZICK


Park Disneyland Park I


WENTTODISNEYLANDALMOST EVERYYEAROF my childhood, and during the past three years since my address and the age of my children qualified me for an annual pass, I’ve been to the park just about once amonth.


You could say I am a CASIO


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Disneyland junkie, but you would be wrong. I don’t have Disney bumper stickers or Disney Christmas tree orna- ments. No mouse ears with my name embroidered across the brim, no souvenirT-shirts, earrings, lockets or costumes. My kids don’t even watch Disney videos, although that’s mostly because they are all absolutely terrifying – drag- ons, dead mothers, evil octopi, witches, wicked step- mothers and heroines with 10-inch waists. I enjoy Disneyland for


all the reasons other Ameri- cans do, but I don’t worship the Disney brand. So, you can’t callme a junkie, but you can call me a minor expert at negotiating the highways and byways around theMagic Kingdom. Inside the park, I can get you anywhere you want to go from Frontierland to Fantasyland, including all restrooms,water fountains, vendors selling sweet things, and more recent discoveries, the mother’s room and the corndog stand. I’m not too sloppy at CaliforniaAdventure, either. But you’re never going to get into


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the park if you don’t park.And parking at the Disneyland parking structure is an adventure all its own. It’s not as if Disney needs any more publicity, so I’d never waste this much ink on it if the subject weren’t so undeniably fascinat- ing. The fact that it took 140,000 cubic yards of concrete to build the structure is staggering all by itself. When I was a child, you simply


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pulled into the lot, hopped on the tram and headed into the best day of your life. But I wasn’t driving or paying attention back then, so the details I remember are limited. It has been “reported” that if you lost your car, you could tell an attendant what time you


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entered the lot and he or she could deliver you to within 20 feet of your vehicle. My “research,” conducted over the Internet, tells me the original Disneyland parking lot served up 15,167 spaces on 100 acres – all organized alphabetically by names of Disney characters. But that was a long time ago. Driving into Disneyland nowa-


days is like participating in a military maneuver. One of the two carpool lanes on the 5 Freeway dumps directly into the entrance to Disney’s parking structure.Thismeans spoiled Southern Californians like me can sail into the park without even changing lanes. From the entrance, 10 lanes (equipped with motion sensors) open up ahead, and each leads to a payment booth (where you are greetedwith smiles and felicitations). Then the dance begins. Parking guides point, wave, ges-


ture and grin each car toward the path of least resistance. Strategically placed pylons help shepherd vehicles into the bowels of the 3.8 million-square-foot


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