F e a t u r e s
Outburst from Mrs H Honey, I’m Home…
M
rs H’s Guide to knowing when He’s back from detachment (in no particular order).
1. The phone rings; you discover that your psychic pills haven’t been working, and that his plane actually landed at Brize two hours earlier than planned – and why aren’t you there to pick him up?
2. His mobile rings after he’s been back on UK soil for about 45 minutes; It’s work, just wondering if he could cover a spot of night-flying tonight.
3. Your washing line turns into a sea of brown for about a week. Most of it could walk into the washing basket by itself.
4. The last sheet of toilet paper has been taken and the roll hasn’t been replaced. Again.
5. A peculiar ethnic ‘thing’ will have arrived in your home. Items can range from t-shirts to funeral urns to carved elephants. You’re supposed to smile and look appreciative. Likewise,
foodstuffs – rice (occasionally with maggots), and alarmingly fluorescent American muesli. Ditto the smiling as you slide it into the bin at the earliest opportunity.
6. You get up in the middle of the night and stub your toe on that **** black kit box that wasn’t there yesterday.
7. He brings home a delectable selection of bugs, ranging from vomititis to dengue fever.
8. Your child/ren, who have been attached to you like velcro for the last few weeks/months, now find you surplus to requirements, because Superdad is home. Bedtime routines go out the window.
All the same, it’s quite nice that he’s back.
Note: All the above apply if it’s ‘she’ coming back from detachment – with the exception of number 4, as women don’t nick the last sheet of loo paper without replacing it.
www.raf-ff.org.uk
Winter 2009
13
Page 1 |
Page 2 |
Page 3 |
Page 4 |
Page 5 |
Page 6 |
Page 7 |
Page 8 |
Page 9 |
Page 10 |
Page 11 |
Page 12 |
Page 13 |
Page 14 |
Page 15 |
Page 16 |
Page 17 |
Page 18 |
Page 19 |
Page 20 |
Page 21 |
Page 22 |
Page 23 |
Page 24 |
Page 25 |
Page 26 |
Page 27 |
Page 28 |
Page 29 |
Page 30 |
Page 31 |
Page 32 |
Page 33 |
Page 34 |
Page 35 |
Page 36 |
Page 37 |
Page 38 |
Page 39 |
Page 40 |
Page 41 |
Page 42 |
Page 43 |
Page 44 |
Page 45 |
Page 46 |
Page 47 |
Page 48 |
Page 49 |
Page 50 |
Page 51 |
Page 52 |
Page 53 |
Page 54 |
Page 55 |
Page 56