F e a t u r e s
to offer me a 10-man tent with good acoustics (for the chain-snorers!) and even a paraffin heater (unserviceable).
Fortunately, the sleeping was kept to a minimum – a 5am wake-up call was followed by a self- administered warm-water bedbath in the dark (except there was no bed or bath!). Obviously a Rooky, I had taken my un-manly electric razor, which aroused attention (buzzing noise) amongst the hardened leathery faces of my wet-shaving Army peers! Without a mirror (bugger!) and in the dark with numb hands, the results weren’t pretty but at least I wasn’t slashing at my face like a low budget horror movie! All this before trudging off for another 18hr day of exercise planning in three inches of snow and mud!
I’d like to say that I have ‘manned-up’ a bit since those early days and certainly invested some hard-earned flying pay in some specialised kit! The banter still keeps pace though and I committed another faux pas recently with my choice of pet, which was not the accepted Retriever, Huskie or Doberman! Personally, I have always liked Cavalier King Charles Spaniels but my choice remains a source of constant amusement to the Army, questioning my levels of testosterone and machismo, especially when the dog wore a coat to work in the winter
(Thanks Mrs D!). Likewise, my little VW Golf (love that car!) apparently doesn’t look right parked next to the Landrover Defenders, Range Rovers or Audis and they don’t bite when I tell them my other car is a Tornado! Just as well RAF guys are comfortable with their masculinity, that’s what I say!
Don’t join the Army unless you are a serious sport-billy (oops, too late)! PT is programmed into my wheezieboy schedule twice a week (rain or shine) and it’s serious stuff too – ‘tabbing’ in boots with 40kg on your back! I’ve learnt so many new words for being
knackered (thrashed, chin-strapped, thredders, hanging out…)! It’s great for team spirit and two hours away from the desk should never be sniffed at (although my time is currently spent in physio after an ankle gave way!).
To sum up a tour – the Air Staff Officer job is not for the faint hearted but ALI is a worthy cause and I am a certainly a better RAF Officer for the experience. Yes, at times it’s been like a bout of swine flu but the banter has been great and despite my occasional indiscretion, I think the RAF have kept pace and retained our sense of humour!
www.raf-ff.org.uk
Spring 2010
17
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