• And the ever so important Intellectual
mask, which likes to be super objec-
tive, structured, and rational, but
never reveals true emotion.
• And last, the vulnerable Rescuer
Will the
mask, who is first in line when there
is a cry for help, always looking for
someone to save, anyone but ourselves.
Real Person
We wear these masks primarily as a
defense mechanism to hide our pain
or feelings of inferiority or unworthi-
Please Stand Up!!
ness. Unfortunately this often causes us
to miss out on many opportunities for
true intimacy with others and even with
ourselves.
So, how can we liberate ourselves
by Rhonda H. Smith
from the roles, labels and masks, so that
M
any years ago there was a With the many roles we play in our
our real self can stand up?
TV show, To Tell the Truth, in lives and the many labels imposed both
We start by respecting our feel-
which a panel of four celebri- internally and externally it is easy to
ings and taking care of ourselves. We
ties would attempt to correctly identify lose our authentic selves. To fit into our
practice speaking openly and honestly,
a contestant from a choice of three roles and labels we often we mask our
letting others see who we really are. We
possibilities. One of the contestants true selves. In The Power of Focus for
realize we have choices in life and seek
normally held an unusual occupation Women, Fran Hewit describes the five
activities that we feel passionate about.
or had done something noteworthy, most prevalent masks women wear.
We strive to be in touch with our true
and it was this person whom the panel
• There is the very common Approval-
emotions and express them in conver-
had to attempt to identify. Two of the
Seeker mask, always hyper-vigilant
sations. And last, we become aware of
people would tell lies, while the real
about what others think, tries to
fulfilling our needs.
person had sworn “to tell the truth.” At
please everyone and rarely feels ap-
When we stop wearing the mask(s)
the end of the show the host would say,
preciated.
and no longer limit ourselves by roles
“Will the real ________ please stand
• Then we have the powerful Victim
and labels, the real person will stand up!
up?” Many times the contestants were
mask, which can lead to misery
Source: The Power of Focus for
so good at concealing their true iden-
because life is unfair, there are no
Women, Fran Hewit
tity, even while telling the truth, that
choices, the situation is hopeless, and
they would stump the panel.
everyone else is to blame.
Rhonda H. Smith is a professional busi-
Would we stump the panel? Are
• The most frequently used mask, the
ness and life coach who nurtures and
we so good at concealing our identity
Busy Bee, who is always on the
inspires her clients to new paths of self-
that even our family and friends wouldn’t
move, constantly picking up, drop-
discovery, awareness and greatness! For
guess the real person? There may even
ping off, volunteering, being produc-
more information, visit CoachRhonda.
be times we don’t know who we are.
tive, but not really feeling passionate.
com. See ad page 12.
May 2009 17
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