THE LAST BISCUIT
Stumbling around the Rockies
Little Bridget can be a pain
BY RHONDA SCHEURER
I have a new friend; her name is
“Little Bridget.” I’ve been taking her
hiking with me a lot lately. I’m not
really sure why she keeps insisting
on coming, though. She doesn’t
even seem to like it. She usually
starts complaining about an hour
into the hike and doesn’t shut up
until well after it’s done.
“Little Bridget” is almost always
around now. At first I hardly even
knew she was there. She kind of
snuck up on me. I first noticed her
hanging around about the time
I snowshoed with the Calgary
Outdoor Club up the back side
of Blueberry Hill. It was quite a
remarkable and challenging trip,
having steep slopes and deep snow
with an unfortunate rotten layer of
old snow buried two to three feet
beneath a bunch of wet, heavy new
snow. The conditions made our
day very challenging, and also gave
us the opportunity to experience
firsthand how avalanches start and
it was because she enjoyed Big Bridget’s company as much as I do,
what it means to have a rotten layer of unstable snow underneath
so I decided to honour my good friend Bridget by naming my new
some heavier top layers. “Little Bridget” was pretty well behaved
friend after her.
that day, but since then she’s become bolder.
If you haven’t guessed by now, “Little Bridget” is not actually a
I think “Little Bridget” might have issues. Have you heard of
person. She is the discomfort in my piriformis muscle… in other
those people who are only happy when they’re being mistreated?
words, a pain in my butt. Not that I’ve bothered going to a doctor
I think “Little Bridget” might be like that. When I realized she
about it or anything, but since I’m such a brilliant self-diagnoser,
probably wasn’t going to go away on her own I decided maybe I
I’ve decided I don’t have classic sciatica because I’m able to
should try being nice to her, so I started paying her more attention,
control it with stretching and heat. piriformis Syndrome is a not-
giving her nice long stretches and warming her with my
yet-widely-acknowledged condition in which the piriformis muscle
heating pad. Funny thing, though, the nicer I am to her, the less
compresses or irritates the sciatic nerve, resulting in pain, tingling
she hangs around.
and/or numbness in the buttock, and radiating down the leg.
Sometimes I take “Little Bridget” down for a visit with Trent.
One of the best things about “Little Bridget” is that by giving her
Trent is my chiropractor and “Little Bridget” has kind of a love-hate
a name, actually giving her the name of my pal, has somehow
relationship with him. I think it’s more “love,” though, because as
made her more tolerable. She has taken on a life and a character
much as she complains during the visits, she’s pretty happy and
all her own and I’ve learned that as long as I don’t take her for
quiet for a while after we see him.
granted she isn’t too hard to put up with. She is my companion,
“Little Bridget” didn’t actually have a name until I took her
and something to talk about when I have nothing else to talk
hiking in Arizona with my very good friend, Bridget (now known as
about. Ultimately, though, I do look forward to the day when she
“Big Bridget”). “Little Bridget” was so enthusiastic about hiking in
decides to finally move on. That “Little Bridget” can be a
Arizona she wouldn’t leave me alone for a second. I’m pretty sure
real badass.
«CO
www.CalgaryOutdoors.ca CALGARY >> WINTER 2008/2009 47
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