by tim parks
hollywood
This December as I write, it is 90 degrees—but I know
from “The Great Orange Hope” that climate change is a hoax perpetuated by the Chinese—and there’s that. I’m just saying, I could really go for a “Winter
WhenIt’s A Wonderful Life debuted in theaters
in 1946, it was considered a flop. However, the Frank Capra film starring James Stewart and Donna Reed has gone on to become a perennial holiday favorite. James Stewart, who portrays George Bailey, a man contemplating suicide (Merry Christmas, movie house!), stated that the role was his favorite to portray on screen. He became so immersed in his interpretation that
while filming the scene where George prays in the bar, he actually broke down into real sobs. It was Donna Reed’s first starring role, one of sitcom TV’s favorite perfect mom/wives. I wonder if every time you vacuum the house all dolled up and wearing pearls—if an angel gets its wings?
Faster than you can say, “Merry Christmas”
and throw in a “Shitter was full,” courtesy of Cousin Eddie (Randy Quaid before he went batshit cray-cray), you have yourself a Griswold-style Christmas. Hapless Clark Griswold (Chevy Chase) stages a homeboundChristmas Vacation for his family (Beverly D’Angelo, Juliette Lewis and Johnny Galecki), after they have experienced hellacious trips to both Wally World and Europe and the results are, naturally, disastrous. In the fiveVacation movies, the characters of
Rusty and Audrey Griswold were played by five different pairs of actors: Anthony- Michael Hall, Dana Barron, Jason Lively, Dana
Wonderland” right about now. So, to help in that endeavor, there is a plethora of time-honored, holiday movies and TV shows that will surely help to get us into the winter groove. Let’s take a look at some fun facts about said time capsules of Christmas past and a gander at the TV specials that are far and away the absolute best examples of donning our gay apparel.
Hill, Johnny Galecki, Juliette Lewis, Ethan Embry, Marisol Nichols, Ed Helms and Leslie Mann. However, in the 1989 yuletide comedy, the characters are younger than the ones in the first two and Audrey is suddenly the older of the two. Must be something in the egg nog…I’ll have what they’re drinking! Conversely, Diane Ladd who plays Chevy Chase’s mother, Nora, is only eight years older than Chase in real life. The term “Griswold house” was introduced into the American lexicon to describe a house that is overly decorated for the holidays.
Someone that literally received “the gift
that kept on giving,” was Bing Crosby. White Christmas ended up being the most profitable movie of 1954 and reinvigorated the perennial favorite Christmas tune. Actu- ally, a re-recording of the song was first introduced by Crosby in 1942’s Holiday Inn. ThoughWhite Christmas features songs by Irving Berlin and stars Crosby, it was not a sequel. I guess, you could call it his signature tune. Rosemary Clooney stated that she took
the role so she could perform with Crosby. Co-star Danny Kaye caused many a retake with his antics that caused cast and crew to laugh when they weren’t supposed to. After the final shot, the cast was informed
that they would film the finale again for the visiting King and Queen of Greece.
However, it was shot without film in the camera, or Crosby...Who skipped out to play golf. Oh, Bing!
Somebody that would probably brain you with a golf club
isBad Santa, as portrayed in 2003 by Billy Bob Thornton. Willie T. Stokes (Thornton) and his dwarf (is height challenged the more P.C. term?) assistant Marcus (Tony Cox), pose as a department store Santa and his elf only to rob the mall at night. Bill Murray was the initial choice to play in the dark comedy, but dropped out to star in Lost in Translation. Actress Lauren Graham, whose character has a Santa fetish, humped a chair during her audition, while Thornton has said he went all “method actor” during the filming, i.e., being very drunk. In the Czech Republic, the film was released as Santa is a Pervert. Way to put the “ho” in ho, ho, hoBad Santa.
DECEMBER 2016 | RAGE monthly 23
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