2011 can be THE year you move your family from


Scream Team to DREAM TEAM! by Sarah Morris


Were your stockings hung by the chimney with care while goals for your


family were up in the air? With the craziness of the holiday season and the frenzied pace at which most of us constantly live, where can we find time to establish a clear vision or set goals for our kids and our families? With the New Year upon us and thoughts of resolutions ringing in our ears, I’d like to suggest that 2011 is THE year to DREAM BIG as a family!


Common EXCUSES for delaying family goal-setting:


1. We can barely make it day-to-day there’s no sense planning long-term. 2. I’ll get to goal-setting as soon I get through ____________ (you fill in the blanks – project at work, home fixups, homework, practices, etc)


3. My kids are learning goal setting at school or church or somewhere else. 4. My kids would think I’m lame if I made goal setting and vision making a big deal.


5. It’s SO much easier just to wing it as we go. What if we set goals and then don’t live up to them? I’ll look like a failure!


STOP MAKING EXCUSES AND DECIDE TO MAKE DREAMING BIG A PRIORITY! Your family’s success depends on it!


A great way to start is by developing a FAMILY MISSION/VISION STATEMENT. WHY?!


It’s been proven that kids whose families have a clear, established vision and goals are much MORE likely to do well in school, say no to drugs, and make wise choices with their peers.


WHAT you will need:


Index cards Poster board, tabletop easel or dry erase board Markers and pens 1-2 hours of family time


WHEN?


Schedule a special FAMILY together time and make sure it’s on every family member’s calendar. This could be a dinner (let the kids choose the menu), a dessert time (YUM!), or anything that works. Talk it up as a SPECIAL time!


WHO attends?


Everyone who lives at your house! Older kids may give you a little attitude but if you are persistent and enthusiastic and set a fun tone, they’ll come around - at least a little bit. If you have younger kids, make sure you’re doing this at a time when their attention will be good and they won’t be tired. And if you’re a blended family where some of your kids aren’t always there, be sure to plan a time where everyone can be there.


WHY are we doing this?


Talk a bit about the importance of having goals and vision. Without both, we don’t have a true sense of purpose, peace or desire to push ourselves to achieve. Without goals, we could miss out on the potential within ourselves – and


our family! 18 North Texas Kids • January 2011 • www.NorthTexasKids.com STEPS TO MAKING YOUR FAMILY MISSION/VISION STATEMENT:


Q&A TIME Start off with some questions. Have someone in charge of writing down


ideas. Set ground rules before you roll. Everyone talks, everyone listens, and everyone is made to feel special for his or her ideas.


QUESTIONS TO ASK:


- What are 3 words you would say describe our family? - What kind of family do we want to be? - What do we want to do? - What kind of feeling do we want to have in our home? - What families inspire us and why?


- How can we contribute to our community as a family and become more service-oriented?


- What are our responsibilities as family members? - What are our family’s highest priorities? - What do we want to do more of? - What do we want to do less of? - What are important character qualities to each of us and why?


HOW TO CAPTURE THE MISSION/VISION One way to capture a concise mission statement for your family is to come up with 2-3 sentences that outline your vision for your family. Focus on a few things that best incorporate the main answers to the questions above. Another way is to come up with an acrostic with your family name or another word that is meaningful to you. Additional instructions along with sample mission statements can be round


at http://www.ehow.com/how_2043790_write-family-mission-statement.html and in the book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families by Stephen Covey.


THIS TAKES TIME! You will not come up with a Mission/Vision Statement for your family in one sitting. Pay attention to the cues of your family but be ready to adjourn as attentions or attitudes start to fade. Going through the questions in one sitting and then coming up with the actual Mission Statement in one or 2 more times together often gets great results.


As Stephen Covey writes in his wonderful book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families, “Creating shared vision creates deep bonding, a sense of unity in purpose, a deep, burning “yes!” that is so powerful, so cohesive, so motivating that it literally pulls people together with a purpose strong enough to transcend the obstacles, the challenges of daily living, the negative scripting of the past and even the accumulated baggage of the present.” And that’s why we say THRIVING FAMILIES DREAM BIG! If you, like most of us, feel you’re struggling to survive the day-to-day demands of parenting, we know that you will be benefit greatly from developing a FAMILY MISSION/VISION STATEMENT.


Move over Scream Team, here comes the DREAM TEAM!


Written by Sarah Morris, Founder/Executive Director of This Side UP! Family FUN Center, a brand new non-profit opening this month in Plano, Texas. They provide a unique and fun environment with entertainment and parenting education to help families move from Surviving to THRIVING! If you like what you read here check out more fun plans and activities for their January focus - THRIVING FAMILIES DREAM BIG! www.thissideupfamily.org.


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