would be glad to help their sons develop
a more accepting attitude.
As I’m sure you know, it’s common for
brothers and sisters of children with
special needs to feel a wide range of
emotions about how their own lives are
affected. At any point in time they may be
embarrassed by how their sibling looks or
behaves, sad that they don’t have a
“regular” brother or sister, angry about the
special attention their sibling gets, or
resentful about the need to take care of
their brother or sister – even as they feel
love and affection for him or her. It’s
important to acknowledge that those
feelings are natural and to allow your son
to talk them through.
On a personal note, your question
evokes strong feelings for me because of
a young man with Down syndrome who
has been a part of my family’s life for
many years. My son sometimes babysat
for this boy – I’ll call him Scott -- and his
brothers when they were young. When
Scott entered high school, my son (then a
senior) drove him to school every day and
they developed a strong friendship that
endured even through the years my son
attended an out-of-state university. At my
son’s wedding a few years ago, Scott was
a member of the wedding party and gave
the most moving toast at the groom’s
dinner. And he was the last person off the
dance floor after the wedding. Scott’s
parents are quick to thank my son for
what he has done for Scott. But I’m
forever grateful for what Scott has done
for my son – helped him develop
Robert J. Laudicino, MD
compassion, genuine respect for
Currently Accepting Gyn Appointments
individual differences, and appreciation
for the warmth and joy that come from
moving past superficial barriers to meet
someone heart to heart. I’m confident
that, with time, familiarity, and thoughtful
adult guidance, the children in your son’s
new school are in for some of life’s most
valuable lessons.
Dr. Erickson is a senior fellow and director
of the Harris Programs in the Center for
718.317.9204
Early Childhood Education at the
4131 Richmond Avenue
University of Minnesota.
Staten Island, NY 10312
www.siparent.com| March 2009 75
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