Attitude Check
Winning is everything... Or is it?
By Linda Cooper
Learning Life Lessons From Horse Shows
T
How parents foster life skills
here is much more to achieve from horse shows than
just winning. Of course everyone likes to be winners, but in
As one of the key partners in the training relationship,
the horse show world, too much attention can be focused
parents have a huge influence on what the rider learns
on the win and not enough about what can be gained from
from showing. Here are some tips for parents to help their
the discipline and training it takes to be a show rider.
rider get the most out of the horse show experience.
Proper coaching is key
•Focus on the ride, not the win
A parent’s reaction to winning (or not) is really important
With the proper coaching and encouragement from
to encouraging the rider’s growth. The focus should not
the trainer and parents, show experiences teach riders
be on whether the rider won the class or not, it should be
to become more confident people. At a show, the riders
on “How did you ride?” How was your horse?” What did
are “on stage”. They are expected to perform what they
you do well?” “What do you think you will work on for
have been practicing in front of a judge and spectators
next time?”
(parents and peers). This provides the opportunity for
them to hone their riding abilities and to build their self
•Teach your rider to take responsibility
confidence. In fact, each time they go into the ring, they
When your rider does not win, don’t blame the judge, ring
come out a stronger, more confident rider. The goal is to
condition, course designer or anyone else. Help your rider
have this increased confidence translate to other areas of
to assess his performance and take responsibility for it.
their lives.
Coaches and parents can
•Help your rider learn composure
Everyone makes mistakes in life. Successful people pick
promote a positive experience
their heads up and go on. When your rider makes a mistake
(or several) in a class, encourage her to get herself together
Translating the horse show experience into positive
and go on to the next one.
tools that riders can apply to other areas of their lives is
strongly dependent on their support system. This is where
•Promote having fun
a solid relationship between the trainer, parent and rider
Your rider is participating in horse shows because he/she
comes into play. This relationship is a partnership with
enjoys horses. Encourage him/her to enjoy the entire
the ultimate goal being to foster the rider’s growth, both
show experience. Horse shows are a great place to bond
on the horse and off. The coach/trainer is responsible for
with the horse and riding friends. And remember, first and
safety and rider development while parents provide the
foremost, the rider should be enjoying the whole horse
emotional support system for their son or daughter.
show experience.
The trainer’s job is to develop each individual horse
•Tell the truth
and rider pair to their full potential, supporting them to
Do not tell your rider a round was good when it was not,
work hard, instilling discipline, and challenging the riders
but let him/her know something he/she did well.
based on their level of skill. The riders that are the most
successful tend to be the ones that also push themselves.
•Offer unconditional support
These riders have a strong support system and mature
No matter how your rider does in the horse show, let him/
quickly as riders and as people. As a trainer, the focus is
her know that you are supportive. Bring up a positive
coaching the show rider to excel in the sport. Parents can
experience, “I am just so glad you stayed on/had a good
help amplify their rider’s performance by being a support
time/rode well, honey”, whether he/she had a great ride
system.
or a not so great ride.
Horse shows offer a great opportunity for riders to expand both in their
horsemanship abilities and to establish life skills. Parents and coaches play a
key part in this learning process. Focusing more on the lessons learned and less
on the win is the key to getting the most out of the horse show experience.
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