He dropped out of studying writing to actually write—some- thing that never occurred to me in half a decade of grad school. When they tried to offer him a fast-track way to finish the degree, just so they could have the honor of calling him an alum- nus, Tom politely declined.
He happily moved back to his small northern hometown and built a successful career writing about the land of his roots, wast- ing no energy wishing to be elsewhere. And that was where our paths ramified in wildly different directions, although we still keep in touch by email and meet once or twice a year to go kayaking. Tom sends emails like people used to in the ‘90s, eschew- ing social media in favor of proper reports on his ever-wilder adventures. He orders boatloads of books at deep discount off the Internet and updates me on what he’s been reading. All the hours I squander in city traffic, doing dishes or the family’s laundry, he must spend reading. Which might explain why, though he’s a de- cade younger than me, Tom so quickly surpassed me in wisdom. Once, after I emailed him that I didn’t know how I’d forgive myself for sacrificing a great travel writing opportunity to stay with my family, he wrote: “Forgive yourself by making the most of this time with your daughter and wife. It sounds hokey, but time goes by way too fast—especially when kids are involved. Do something special with them and write about it.” This was a guy in his mid-twenties offering advice to a guy in his mid-thirties. Tom’s life has become my compass for how to live simply and focus on the most important things. Last time I drove out to the sticks to visit him, I came home wrung with doubt about how I was spending my days and resolving to apply a What Would Tom Do (WWTD) principle to my life. He so unselfconsciously embodies the dirtbag ethic of living more richly with less stuff, not out of any sort of righteous commitment, but simply be- cause he couldn’t imagine living any other way. WWTD means not constantly stressing about money, because none of the things I truly love are expensive. Not feeling bad that I don’t have a fancy house with more than one bathroom, or a vacation home like some of my friends (Tom believes second homes are a waste of resources, not surprising since he spends so little time in his first one). WWTD means owning little else but a garage full of kayaks and canoes and a basement full of skis. WWTD means investing more in life experiences and close friendships than in conventional definitions of getting ahead. If Tom were a petty person, it might have split a rift between us when I admitted that I spend upwards of $1,600 a month on groceries. At my house we sometimes treat ourselves to a $30 salmon fillet from the sustainable fishmonger and an $8 pint of handmade local ice cream, topped off with a premium microbrew or a $22-a-pound, locally roasted, single origin coffee. Last time I stayed at Tom’s house we filled our plates with samosas and hummus he’d bought from the culinary students at the local college, adding some rice from his pantry. He pulled a few beers from the back of his fridge that somebody had given him in exchange for a favor. Then he asked, “Do you want to share a tea bag?”
I joke that Tom is more successful than me at living the life I always wanted. Somewhere along the way he morphed from being my friend to being something more, a touchstone to a roaming existence of wilderness adventure that I once aspired to, the dream of a successful outdoor writing career and all the freedom and excitement that implies.
Even if I can’t keep up to Tom himself, I will always keep up our friendship. His stories are an inspiration; reminding me those dreams aren’t really impossible, they just required different choic- es than the ones I made. Choices that for me would have been daring and radical, but for Tom came as naturally as breathing. Waterlines columnist Tim Shuff is a former editor at Adventure Kayak and embraces both the playful and serious sides of paddling.
www.adventurekayakmag.com | 35
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PADDLING ADVENTURE October 3rd
Steinhatchee / Jena, Florida
HIDDEN COAST through 5th
, 2014
Our premier paddle starts at Steinhatchee River Falls
HiddenCoastPaddlingAdventures.com This project received financial support from
Did you know that Florida had Waterfalls?
We’re pretty sure he’s not thinking about his PFD right now.
PHOTO: RICK MATTHEWS
5th Annual
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