// BONSPIEL CALENDAR Cambridge, MN
rocket exhaust Top 10 Narrative Storylines on the
Hit New HBO Series Game of T rones By Richard Maskel
10] T e sudden demise of venerated skip Robert Baratheon, who is killed by a wild boar while out throwing practice stones, sparks “T e War of the Five Curling Clubs.” 9] Bran Stark is tossed out of a derelict tower window by Ser Jaime Lan- nister aſt er the youngster accidentally discovers “T e Kingslayer” and his twin sister Cersei engaged in an illicit “mixed doubles” relationship. 8] As an honored guest of the nomadic warlord Khal Drogo, exiled ruler Viserys Targaryen spectates at a royal curling tournament and is duly advised that “a Dothraki bonspiel without at least three deaths is con- sidered a dull aff air.” 7] Aſt er being named “Hand of the Skip,” Ned Stark blows a routine sweep call and is promptly beheaded by the sociopathic teenage King Joff rey Baratheon. 6] Given the overwhelming success of the “Red Wedding,” Lord Walder Frey is completely mystifi ed as to why no one seems willing to come to the Twins and participate in his newly inaugurated “Red Bonspiel.” 5] Ruthless Lord Tywin Lannister decrees that his despised dwarf son Tyrion will only be allowed to compete in the “Casterly Rockspiel” un- der the condition that his play be restricted to “T e Short Game.” 4] Daenerys Targaryen draws the button to secure a crucial win and becomes forever aſt er known as “Daenerys Stormborn, Queen of the Andals and the First Men, Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea, Breaker of Chains, Mother of Dragons, and Owner of Four Foots.” 3] On the run from the Lannisters, Ned Stark’s tomboy daughter Arya escapes from the King’s Landing Club and hides out by disguising her- self as a front end player on a junior men’s team. 2] In a shocking turn of events, illegitimate Stark son Jon Snow deserts his Night’s Watch playdown teammates and joins up with the arch-rival Wildling curlers north of the Wall. 1] Absolutely everyone in the Seven Kingdoms of Westeros keeps ob- sessing about the fact that the “Winter Curling Season” is coming and it’s four years long!
Cleveland, OH Clintonville, WI
Curl Mesabi, MN (Eveleth) Fargo-Moorhead, ND Hibbing, MN
Kettle Moraine, WI Milwaukee, WI St. Paul, MN
Two Harbors, MN Waupaca, WI Wausau, WI
JAN. 28-29 Chicago, IL
JAN. 31-FEB. 2 Brainerd, MN
Centerville, WI Delta Rocks, MI Detroit, MI
Milwaukee, WI Norfolk, CT
Rice Lake, WI
Schenectady, NY Waupaca, WI
FEB. 7-9 Anchorage, AK
Broomstones, MA Centerville, WI Detroit, MI
Madison, WI Milwaukee, WI Minot, ND
Pardeeville, WI Racine, WI
Stevens Point, WI Wausau, WI
FEB. 14-16 Belfast, ME
Broomstones, MA Cambridge, MN
ing the Five-and-Under Women’s Challenge on Dec. 6-7. Look for the fl yer and entry form on the USWCA website under bonspiels. Next season, the 5 & Under Women’s Challenge will be hosted by Arden Hills, also in Min- nesota. T e date is yet to be determined. T ere have been no confi rmations from the West II Region. Look for
postings from them in the near future on the USWCA website under the- Five-and-Under bonspiel link. Curlers who have fi ve years or less experience are eligible to participate
in a fi ve-and-under open or women’s bonspiel. T e Five-and-Under Wom- en’s Challenge is made up of women’s teams. But, the new Five-and-Under Open Challenge features teams composed of males and females. Composite teams are acceptable. Membership in the USWCA is not necessary, but to host the event, the club must be a member. For more information, please check the USWCA website under bonspiels. ■
Copper Country, MI Detroit, MI Duluth, MN
Grand Forks, ND Green Bay, WI
Heather, MN (Mapleton) Itasca, MN Madison, WI Medford, WI Plainfi eld, NJ Poynette, WI Rochester, NY
Schenectady, NY Utica, NY
Waltham, IL Waupaca, WI Wausau, WI
W X X
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FEB. 28-MARCH 2 Albany, NY
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Curl Mesabi, MN Evergreen, OR
Fargo-Moorhead, ND Grand Forks, ND Granite, WA
Lake Region, ND Madison, WI Marshfi eld, WI Medford, WI
Schenectady, NY Superior, WI Tri-City, WI
Two Harbors, MN Vikingland, MN Waltham, IL
MARCH 7-9 Bemidji, MN
Centerville, WI Columbus, OH
Cook County, MN Curl Mesabi, MN Grafton, ND
Green Bay, WI Milwaukee, WI Nashua, NH
Heather, MN (Mapleton) Schenectady, NY Stevens Point, WI Wauwatosa, WI Williston, ND
MARCH 14-16 Belfast, ME
Broomstones, MA Cambridge, MN Centerville, WI Curl Mesabi, MN Duluth, MN Grafton, ND
Grand Forks, ND
Granite, WA (Seattle) Green Bay, WI Lodi, WI
M X J
O J
O S
M X
O M
OC M O O X
M O O O O
W W W M X
M M M X
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USA Curling (( 23
Wauwatosa, WI
FEB. 21-23 Albany, NY
Anchorage, AK Ardsley, NY
Centerville, WI Cook County, MN
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W O
M M X
Heather, MN (Mapleton) W Kettle Moraine, WI Mayfi eld, OH Nutmeg, CT St. Paul, MN Utica, NY
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