baptized T
Twelve clicks for a By Rich Melheim baby
his Facebook thread caught my attention, and generated plenty of discussion from my clergy friends: Folks in my congregation are in an uproar because I
wouldn’t baptize the grandson/great-grandson of members because the parents don’t attend, and don’t intend to attend, any church (and they live a state away). [I’ve always believed we baptize] into a community, not “on command” .… One friend responded, “Pour water on that baby and trust the Spirit. God’s promises are more abundant and far-reaching than we can know.”
I agreed, and add this to the discussion: Yes, baptize that baby, but con- sider starting a faith conver- sation and relationship with the parents with 12 little com- munication clicks—one a month—for the next year.
Start by getting email addresses from the parents, grand- parents and sponsors on baptism day while they still
remember who you are. Or request their friendship on Facebook since messages via this site may feel less intrusive. Put a reminder on your calendar to send them one note of encouragement each month on the baptismal date for the next year—something like this: Note 1.“Wonderful to be part of your special day. God bless you as you keep your baptismal promises.” 2. “Thinking of you and that beautiful baby today ....” 3. “How’s it going? Getting any sleep?” 4. “Thought of you when I read this. (Include a link to a short, practical parenting article.)
5. “What would you like me to pray for this month?” 6. “Thought of you again today. Hope your highs are outweighing the lows. And take care of yourself [and each other]. You aren’t much good to the baby if you aren’t keeping healthy yourself.”
7. “Coffee next time you’re in town?” 8. “I’m wondering how this church might better serve other young parents after baptism. Do you have some ideas?”
9. “What’s been a high and a low from the last year? I’m getting ready to teach a baptism class and I’d love to include you via Skype.”
10. “Have you found a good faith community yet where you can help other young parents keep their baptismal vows?”
11. “Wow! Almost a year since So-and-So’s baptism.” 12. “Happy baptismal birthday! I am honored to have been a part of that day, and hope you find ways to celebrate today. (Include suggestions.)” In other words, yes, pour the water on that baby. And if this family doesn’t have a faith community, be that faith community in this small way with 12 short mes- sages or emails. Then pray they will one day become the community for others because you’ve taken time to communicate with them. I know what you’re thinking, pastor: “What makes you think I have time to do this?” Try this: Cut and paste these little notes on your cal- endar today. It will only take 30 seconds a month to send each note, but it could make all the difference in that family’s faith life if they’re connected somehow to the Vine through you. If you don’t have 30 seconds a month for follow-up, you shouldn’t have dunked the baby in the first place.
Melheim, a pastor in the St. Paul Area Synod, is founder of Faith
Inkubators (
www.faithink.com) and author of Holding Your Family Together (Regal, 2013).
July 2013 27
ASHLEY HAYHURST
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