The Hall of Fame Can they lick it? Yes they can Giggity Giggity
With the shocking rev- elation that it was Ryan Giggs at the centre of the Twitter soccer scandal the HoF took to wondering whether any super injunctions existed in the mortgage market. With the likes of Fred
The Manchester Mortgage Business Expo was a rip-roaring success and not least for Harpal Singh, managing director of Conveyancing Alliance. Not only has Harpal found fame as the new in-
dustry Family Guy with a striking resemblance to Peter Griffin, AKA Terry Pritchard, he managed to get his chops around a couple of stunning ‘99ers after dishing out free ice-cream at the packed event.
“Brokers loved our ’99’ ice-cream theme and
we ended up giving out over 300 free ice-creams to all attendees,” a smiling Harpal beamed to the HoF. “We even had a queue at one point during the afternoon... All in all, it was a really successful and busy trip to Manchester Expo – ice-y cream was nice-y cream for us and brokers can certainly expect more of the same at events in the future.”
I’m too sexy to insure Are you insured for sex? It seems not according to
one worrying poll. But research at Mortgage Introducer Towers has
revealed it’s important that you get the correct in- surance for the sex that you’re having. So with that in mind we’ve itched our scratch
and put together a list of companies that should, we hope, cater for the needs of even our most discern- ing readers. Just having sex with your wife? We suggest you
take a look at Legal & General. More intent with sex on the telephone? Take a look at Direct Line. Only having sex with your partner? Check out Standard Life. Having sex with someone different? Try Go Com-
pare. Sex with the oversized? Maybe More Than can
fulfil your needs. If dogging is more your style and you like having
sex in the back seat of your car why don’t you take a look at Sheila’s Wheels or if posh is more your style then why not try Privileged. And as we operate a fully inclusive policy at Mort-
gage Introducer, for those wanting sex with a trans- vestite, have a look at
confused.com.
58 MOrTGAGE INTrODuCEr JUNE 2011
Congratulations to Glen Kenji who will shortly receive £50 of John Lewis vouchers courtesy of Kensington.
Just take a look at this photo of an England training session and work out where the ball is.
Photocopy the page, put a cross where you think the centre of the ball is, and send it – along with your name and address – to Nia at the address on page 3. Good luck!
“the shred” Goodwin having already used the power to hide an affair the HoF can think of countless other high profile reprobates who would be quick to spend their Schillings to ensure their reputation remains intact. “You think Giggs and Goodwin misbehaved?” our source confessed. “There have been countless chief execs with bits on the side and still are. The Shred isn’t the first and will no means be the last.”
The Shred’s Super Injunction and the curious FSA
Sir Fred “The Shred” Goodwin steps into the Hall of Fame this month for trying to hide his affair with a colleague while he was chief executive of the failed bank. And now Andrew Tyrie, Tory head of the
Treasury Select Committee, has slammed the Financial Services Authority for sitting on a report into the bank’s demise – going so far as to send in two experts who will determine if the FSA is guilty of a whitewash.
“The public has not had an adequate explanation of the reasons of RBS’s failure,” Tyrie told the HoF. And The Sun newspaper was up in arms too. “The public are entitled to be disgusted at the
secrecy surrounding the RBS disaster,” the paper piped up. “It is understood the FSA is refusing to reveal its full findings. It won’t even disclose who it interviewed. Meanwhile the boss involved has been protected by the courts. When The Sun says injunctions operate against the public interest, this is precisely what we mean.”
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