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PALMER FEST


PALMER RAPIDS, ON MAY 19, 20, 21, 2006 Victoria Day long weekend hosted at Paddler Co-op Boathouse


REGISTER NOW: www.rapidmedia.com/palmerfest


LEARN TO PADDLE WHITEWATER!


Women’s only whitewater kayak clinics


WHITEWATER PA D D L I N G F E S T I V A L


Whitewater open canoe and C-1


clinics and demos DEMOS and CLINICS


INTRO TO ADVANCED FREESTYLE, SLALOM, RIVER RUNNING


CATERED BBQ • BEER GARDEN CAMPING • DAYCARE


Rock the Boat


3


doesn’t generate any hype, it’s all over. You might as well do nothing at all. It’s just like the proverbial tree in the forest. You


know, if a tree falls in a forest and there’s nobody there to see it, did it really happen? And if you round Cape Horn and…. You get the idea. Your sponsors won’t be happy. You might even have to pay for all that free gear, just like every other schmo who dips a paddle in the sea. Lame! Imagine, however, that the tree falling in the forest is sponsored. It’s all covered in the Coca-Cola swirl and Microsoft stickers, and there’s a tie-in to Extreme Tree Falling Week on TSN hosted by Paris Hilton and Pru- dential Insurance. A scrum of reporters and photogra- phers are on the ground while the NBC news chopper circles overhead. FOX has nailed a killer crane shot for the live feed and Geraldo Rivera is working his TV magic. The tree sways, the crowd goes quiet, the Olsen Twins hold their breath…. Now that’s the right way for a tree to fall in the forest if it wants to get noticed.


The NBC news chopper circles overhead. FOX has nailed a killer crane shot for the live feed and Geraldo Rivera is working his TV magic.


These days when all the big trips have been done


and the good destinations used up, marketing is the next frontier. Anybody can launch a kayak and try to paddle to Hawaii—again (although if you want to sur- vive, you should definitely try to get Ed to come along). But it will take a real adventurous soul to push the boundaries of expedition marketing, to go beyond the limits of sponsorship from mere manufacturers of pad- dling equipment, those small, struggling Mom and Pop enterprises with limited budgets and no international media leverage. The really big dreamers will tap into the unexplored reaches of the Dow Jones companies and mega-media conglomerates like Pfizer, Philip Mor- ris and Disney. Imagine the Viagra-Marlborough-Jack Daniels Sea


Kayak Expedition, bringing the message of “life-en- hancing drugs, a smooth smoke and mellow Tennes- see bourbon” to small communities up and down our great, unspoiled coasts. Think of the possibilities. And think of the free product. Now that’s an expedition I’d want to be part of!


*For any canoeist reading this, “reportage” does not mean to carry your boat to the same location twice.


— Alex Matthews is the co-author of the instructional DVD The Ultimate Guide to Sea Kayaking and has written three books on kayaking due to be published in 2006. He is the veteran of several sponsored kayak trips.


26 || Adventure Kayak spring 2006


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