take sequences mixes awkwardly with the failed at- tempts at horror. The proceedings feel more reminis- cent of a filmed play than an actual movie. In the hands of a different filmmaker, the innovative struc- ture and stagey flashbacks might have worked. But despite Birkett’s highlight performance, Lo is ama- teurish and unable to rise above its meagre budget, proving the road to hell is paved with good intentions.
JASON LAPEYRE RIPE INDEED
Overlooked, Forgotten and Dismissed
:
RAVAGE THE SCREAM QUEEN Bill Zebub Productions
I wasn’t sure what my focus would be for the 100th issue – Lance Henriksen or Jed Rowen? Brain Damage or The Asylum? Lesbian werewolves or killer dildos? Then I received a letter from writer/director Bill Zebub, assuring me that if I decided to feature three of his films, women would “fall from the sky and peck at me with soft lips and hard nipples.” Deal sealed! Ravage follows two depraved friends who pose as independent filmmakers so that they can
lure women back to their house to rape, torture and kill, while recording the proceedings for their very own snuff film. Rife with fake blood, bondage babes and a shitload of recycled footage from Zebub’s previous outings, this isn’t recommended unless you’re already into subpar torture porn. BODY COUNT: 12 NAKED GIRLS: 19
BREAKING HER WILL Bill Zebub Productions
If you were offended by the events described in the previous review, hold on to your pants – things are gonna get a whole lot sleazier. Breaking Her Will features a demented pervert who kidnaps a woman to be his sex slave. By slowly dehumanizing her through a series of prolonged rapes (accompanied by disturbing humiliation and horrific degradation), the deviant wears his subject down to the point where she willingly helps kidnap and abuse other
victims. Even though the sexual acts are softcore (no penetration or man-junk on display here), it’s still quite disconcerting and uncomfortable to watch. But apparently there’s a market for this kind of film, because there’s a lot of sickos out there. I should know, I’m one of ’em! BODY COUNT: 4 NAKED GIRLS: 15
NIGHT OF THE PUMPKIN Bill Zebub Productions
Maybe it was an act of God (or Satan), maybe the planets were in the right alignment or maybe it was simply an accident, but somehow Zebub finally got his directorial shit together. This fun, campy throwback to the gory slasher/stalker fare of yesteryear sees a group of college students organiz- ing a Halloween party become prey for a monster with a bloodsoaked jack- o’-lantern head (hence the title). Yes, there are many of the usual no-budget
shortcomings, but overall this movie marks a turning point for Zebub. It’s got a coherent storyline chock full of witty dialogue, rather than just an endless parade of naked women. Well done, Bill! I’d shake your hand if I weren’t sure that I’d catch something horribly contagious. BODY COUNT: 9 NAKED GIRLS: 4
LAST CHANCE LANCE CINE MACA B R E
THE CARETAKER Starring Jennifer Tilly, Judd Nelson and Kira Verrastro
Directed by Bryce Olson Written by Jackie Olson MTI Home Video
“He turned an ordinary fruit picker into a weapon of
mass destruction!” exclaims a future victim of the killer’s armament of choice in Bryce Olson’s new slasher film The Caretaker. But if you’re hoping for car- nage, misery and suffering rendered with a sickening level of blood, best prepare yourself for a meagre har- vest, as this killer custodian seems happy to muster only a gentle dose of brutality with his gardening tool of terror. On the eve of the homecoming dance, which just
happens to coincide with Halloween, three rowdy jocks and their dates detour their limo to an abandoned house located in a grape- fruit orchard, hoping to give the girls a good scare. As legend has it, the caretaker of the crops – driven psy- chotically jealous by work- ers moving in on his trophy wife – took a fruit picker to the whole lot of them and has been making the rounds ever since. Following page one of the horror movie handbook, the kids split up to explore the storied grounds and, predictably, get, well, picked off one by one as the fabled caretaker makes a predictable series of violent appearances. Not surprisingly, The Caretaker plays out almost like
a trailer version of itself, jumping through gaping plot holes and constantly cutting away, cheating the viewer of any real violence. The killing tool, a modified grape- fruit-picking device, looks pretty damn brutal and seems, uh, ripe for a number of carnage configura- tions. Instead, though, the kills involve scenes of rolling grapefruits (I’m not kidding) and implied attacks, fol- lowed by shots of the victims looking like they were pawed by an agitated cat. The characters are developed as much as any sin-
gle word can stereotypically describe: “horny,” “scared,” “bitchy,” “stupid,” etc., and not even ap- pearances by Jennifer Tilly as a cougar school teacher who shares a sexual history with the killer or aging rebel Judd Nelson as a forewarning father can prevent The Caretaker from leaving a sour taste in your mouth. JAMES KING
Page 1 |
Page 2 |
Page 3 |
Page 4 |
Page 5 |
Page 6 |
Page 7 |
Page 8 |
Page 9 |
Page 10 |
Page 11 |
Page 12 |
Page 13 |
Page 14 |
Page 15 |
Page 16 |
Page 17 |
Page 18 |
Page 19 |
Page 20 |
Page 21 |
Page 22 |
Page 23 |
Page 24 |
Page 25 |
Page 26 |
Page 27 |
Page 28 |
Page 29 |
Page 30 |
Page 31 |
Page 32 |
Page 33 |
Page 34 |
Page 35 |
Page 36 |
Page 37 |
Page 38 |
Page 39 |
Page 40 |
Page 41 |
Page 42 |
Page 43 |
Page 44 |
Page 45 |
Page 46 |
Page 47 |
Page 48 |
Page 49 |
Page 50 |
Page 51 |
Page 52 |
Page 53 |
Page 54 |
Page 55 |
Page 56 |
Page 57 |
Page 58 |
Page 59 |
Page 60 |
Page 61 |
Page 62 |
Page 63 |
Page 64 |
Page 65 |
Page 66 |
Page 67 |
Page 68 |
Page 69 |
Page 70 |
Page 71 |
Page 72 |
Page 73 |
Page 74 |
Page 75 |
Page 76 |
Page 77 |
Page 78 |
Page 79 |
Page 80 |
Page 81 |
Page 82 |
Page 83 |
Page 84 |
Page 85 |
Page 86 |
Page 87 |
Page 88 |
Page 89 |
Page 90 |
Page 91 |
Page 92 |
Page 93 |
Page 94 |
Page 95 |
Page 96 |
Page 97 |
Page 98 |
Page 99 |
Page 100