Marcus has discovered that working from home has had


advantages. “Now, I can do a load of laundry in-between meetings, go to the grocery store when I would have been commuting and be more present when my kids are home. Since I’m not worried about rushing out the door, we have time to talk during breakfast, and I’m able to accompany them to the bus stop. Aſterwards, I take 10 minutes for myself to walk around the block and gather my thoughts for the day,” she explains.


Reordering Priorities Seventy-one percent of mothers describe being a working mom during the pandemic as very challenging, according to research done by the global consultancy group APCO Impact. As president of Families and Work Institute (FamiliesAndWork. org), a New York-based research nonprofit, Ellen Galinsky has seen employers grant access to a wider variety of benefits that fit their employees’ individual and family needs. “Te pandemic, coupled with racial reckoning, has made many of us rethink our priorities. It now is becoming clear that the world that seemed relatively normal before wasn’t working. Mothers and fathers were thrust on the front lines of schooling and saw firsthand how different teaching and parenting are,” Galinsky notes. An estimated 82 percent of employers plan to allow their


employees to keep working remotely aſter the pandemic, reports a survey by human resources consultancy Mercer, but that turnaround is just a first step, says Galinsky. “Studies show that having workplace flexibility procedures in place is a floor, but how employers treat you when you need that flexibility matters the most. Te pandemic made us all experience collective and multiple losses together and brought some difficult issues to light,” she explains. In juggling work and life duties, Galinsky shies away from the


word “balance”, which suggests that time and energy needs to be split evenly. “Work and home lives are deeply intermingled, and oſten when one is in sync, the other will follow,” she says. “It’s important for mothers to set realistic expectations for themselves and let go of the notion that they’re not doing a good job, their kids have to be perfect or they don’t have time to take care of themselves. Children will absorb what they see, so being mindful in your words and actions around work will have an impact on them. If you have a stressful meeting and bring that home with you, the energy in the house will change. It’s okay to tell the kids that you’re upset at your boss and are going to call a friend and talk or go for a walk; let them know it’s not their fault and that parents get stressed, too.”


Stress Survival Skills Te pandemic also put many mothers in a chronic state of hypervigilance, because they not only had to manage their own anxiety, but also help kids manage their experiences. A University of Rochester study of 153 mothers of toddlers found that ongoing strains can disrupt the body’s natural stress response, making it more difficult to respond with patience and sensitivity to a child’s needs.


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